What tha hell...

I got nuthin. My sister called him this morning at my urging to at
least keep him... Informed and not stranded and clueless. She packed
the kids up, went and got him, and they all drove home.

JAY-ZUS!!

--
Sent from my mobile device

Cooler heads

No more drama. Got in bed around 1:30. Waiting for the next step. I
can handle sober ppl.

Memories... YAY!!

Christmas was great in pluffistan. Everybody got what they wanted.

The day after, my little angel got on stage and danced her little
heart out in the Moscow Ballet's Nutcracker. At the end, during the
bows, the Prima Ballerina walked back and held hands with C and took
a bow with her. My Mom went apeshit. She was jumping up and down and
squealing.

Then my sister and her whole family came to visit. Yesterday was
cool. The youngest was sick and fussy. But all in all it was an ok
day.

Today we just hung out. My Mom gave my sis and I $100 to go out to a
nice dinner. We picked a VERY nice place. Things started off great.
About 2/3 the way through dinner my BIL got quiet. Then it was
obvious he was DRUNK. Which was cool.. He was quiet about it so at
least he was handling. We paid our bill and left. On the way home he
was pretty funny.

Then it got ugly. They decided to leave their girls here, but take the
boy (18 mos) back to the hotel. The went out to the car to put him in
and leave. I noticed after a few minutes they hadn't left. I was
cutting up in the kitchen with everyone else, still noticing they
hadn't left, when my sis came running in crying calling for me. I went
running to the door following her. My BIL was walking down the
sidewalk with the baby away from the house. My sister made a beeline
at him screaming "HE HIT ME TWICE!!"

FUG... It was a mess. She was screaming he hit her he said she clocked
him for no reason. He was holding the boy. I just got between them and
tried to get them to shut up and step away from each other.

Finally I got my sister to go in the house so I could talk to the BIL.
He's in the highly aggressive branch of the military known for their
toughness. He also lifts weights and is massive. Think "swede" from
Heartbreak Ridge with Clint Eastwood.

He wouldn't give up the boy. He started with "she'll take him and I'll
never see him again". At this point I just wanted her inside and him
back at the hotel. After a while he finally handed me the boy and I
took him inside to my sister.

She... Well she was in a state. She's ranting and raving about killing
him and divorce and this and that. I just told her to stay inside and
leave it to me.

Meanwhile, the BIL was trying to get in his truck to drive.
Fortunately, the keys were in the house. I convinced him to get in my
truck and let me take him to the hotel.

Back at the hotel, I walked him to his room to be sure he didn't get
sidetracked. And we talked. He started telling me how she "kicked" him
in the head. First, he was handing her the baby. 2nd, I'm rusty, but
I was at least taking karate up until june and I don't think I could
kick him in the head without a lot of stretching much less her who is
shorter and never taken martial arts in her life. Then he went on
and on about how he hates her and she'll be gone in the morning with
his kids and on and on. I promised him over and over it wasn't
happening and left him in the room.

Of course no sooner had I walked in the door than he started calling
my stepfather. He demanded to talk to my sister or he was coming over.

I think my stepfather talked him out of it. But, here I am
nonetheless sitting in the living room in the dark watching, and for
the first time ever, packing for real.

Memories... YAY!!!

There's other stuff unrelated to the incident. But it'll wait.

FUG!!

Have a Very Merry Christmas!

And Happy Holidays!

Yesterday was a little gloom and doom. But if you've read any of the
archives, you'll know this is nothing new. C is my life and I made my
choices. Mrs has always deserved more from me. It is surprising to me
how acute the feeling is now that I actually talked to Sandy. Almost
an ache. I've fooled around before and had some fun. But until now, it
has never been more than that. And I'm a little taken back. But you
play adult games... You sometimes have adult consequences.

At this very moment, I'm thinking about Christmas and my Daughter and
how much I WISH I could give Mrs what she deserves. We're going to
have a Merry Christmas if it kills me.

So that's it for now. Nothing happening. Out of sight out of mind and all...

From the bottom of my heart.. I wish everyone a Merry Christmas and
Happy Holidays!

The Mountains

I had to make a trip to the luv shak over the weekend. Long story but
there were some gifts I needed to get. I invited Sandy like I always
do. I didn't expect her to go. To my surprise she said yes. I figured
she'd back out. Make some excuse. Other plans etc. Sat rolled around.
I got up early to pick her up. My phone rang as I drove to her house.
I thought "here we go". But I was wrong. She was calling to tell me
she was running a few minutes late.

We made a pit stop at a shop she frequents in a town kinda on the way.
Finally, we got to the luv shak. It was pouring.

After turning on everything needing turning on. We cracked open some
wine and sat on the porch. We talked about a lot of nothing. Finally
it started getting dark and cold. I started the fire to grill dinner.

It was nice. Steaks. Taters. Candlelight. We got a little hammered.
The talk turned to friends and relationships. Eventually we decided to
turn in.

There are two places to sleep now. In the camper. Or in a newly built
bedroom in the "barn". The bedroom has a real bath. But its in the
barn. The camper has "camper" amenities. Portalet (attached to sewer
but a portalet nonetheless), little tiny shower. Sandy opted for the
barn.

We moved our stuff in that direction. I ended up making about 20 trips
back to the camper for stuff. Finally, she showered, I showered. We
decided to listen to a book on CD. I popped the CD in and we climbed
into bed. We listened for a bit, then I heard snoring. I turned off
the book and climbed back in bed.

It was a long night. I couldn't sleep. Sandy did. Occasionally I'd
roll over and put my arm around her. She'd sigh in her sleep.

Finally morning came. I rolled over and put my arms around her. The I
finally mustered the balls. I asked her why she came. We talked. She
eas interestwd and curious. But practical. I'm married.. She doesn't
want a fling. She wants a family. She kept her back to me. She asked
me why I asked her there. I told her I was seriously attracted. We
talked some more. Her bacl still to me. Finally I said "come here".
She said " I am here". I said "no.. Lookat me". She did. I wrapped her
up. Then I tilted her face and kissed her. It was obvious that was
all that was going to happen.. And I was ok with that. I just wanted
to do it just once (kiss you pervs). The I showered and she showered
and we left.

We talked a lot more on the way home but it was more repetition.

So there you have it. I made a move. Failed. Story of my life. But at
least I made a move.

The problem now, is I can't bring myself to be with Mrs. I've fooled
around before and it was just fun. This time, I can't let it go. I
can't kiss mrs. I damned sure can't have sex. I bristle at every
minute I'm here and not with Sandy. Jayzuz I'm fucked.

The thing is, I don't think we'd work. I think we'd kill each other.
But I can't help it. The heart wants what it wants.

[end]

--
Sent from my mobile device

HNT - My Pecker

Well... only in an obscure kinda way...

Pictures of my Pussy

Per request... ;)

Breathin...

I'm still here... as I mentioned before I'm in a weird blog place.  I feel as if I've been saying the same thing over and over for the last 2 years...  As I've been doing this "blog thing" since about 2004ish I've hit a point where I'm sort of out of ideas.. or maybe talked out..

 

But I promise I'm going to shake some things up a bit soon. 

 

In the meantime... the state of Pluffistan... Nuthin... I mentioned going to a match out of town and sharing a room with Sandy.  I did.  We did (share a room that is).  We even ended up in bed together but nothing happened... at all... not even a kiss...

 

BK.. well... at least for the near future she's gone.  Out of the picture.  I may or may not have mentioned the reason,  but she spends an inordinate amount of time working for her Mom several states away.  If I believe what she tells me,  her Mom pretty much uses and abuses her for upto 2 months at a time.  She is gone to far away state as we speak.  But more importantly,  she says she now has a boyfriend.  Now I'm totally ok with fucking up my life.  But hers is kinda fucked up as it is.  The guy shoots pool on Wed nights so theres a good chance I'll see him and,  when she's back,  her around together.  It's all she needs is for some old married guy to be the fly in her happy ointment.  So as long as they're together,  I will keep a respectful distance and sincerely wish her happiness.

 

Pool sucks rhino ass right now.  We've been short handed all session.  But the last few weeks key players have had their handicap go up.  It's kinda convoluted,  but there is a cap on the total handicap you can play on any given night.  This is to keep you from loading up your team with the top players and blowing everyone out.  We have been right on the bleeding edge all session.  With 2 players going up in handicap,  it is almost impossible not to exceed the cap.  Wed night 2 players didn't show up.  I knew about one,  the other never bothered to call.  I tried calling him a couple of times and finally got in touch with him after I had already started the first match (actually had already finished).  It royally fucked up my strategy for the night.  Another player sprung on me he wasn't playing next session.  Which is fine.  But a couple of weeks ago the league asked for a committment from the teams.  I asked him then.  I was ok with him saying no.  But he said yes.  THEN he sprung it after I've already committed.  I hate people sometimes.  Anyway,  we're done for the next 3 weeks. 

 

Things are ok with work.  There was big talk of layoffs.  Even the President sent out an e-mail and used the word "pain" or "painful" as it related to upcoming decisions.  Can never be a good thing.  As of now,  the layoffs have happened that will impact me.  There are more to come but in another division.  For now.  Having said that,  I know one of the guys on the security team was keeping stats on DNS lookups.  Firefox on linux was causing an unusual amount of DNS traffic for each lookup.  To the point where my maching topped the list.  So imagine the "oh shit" moment when I see my fav blogs at the top of hte list associated with MY IP... Yet another reason for laying low. 

 

So there you have it...

 

Now,  for the near future.  I'm toying with the idea of maybe doing some vid posts and pic posts.  Just to shake things up a bit.  Inspiration and such.