Damn the timing...

We were hanging out, as usual. The banter was, also as usual, sexually charged. She was packing a bag. I don't remember the comment. Whatever it was, it prompted me to playfully grab her sides while she bent over her bag. I was going for a pseudo tickle, except she isn't ticklish. To my surprise, she stood up and leaned back into me. My arms slid around her waist pulling her close. My mouth found her ear as I playfully nibbled. She arched her back pressing her ass against my growing bulge. This was heating up quickly. I started playfully thinking she would just push me away laughing. Should I continue? I turned so that we were both alongside the bed and let my body fall so that she fell too. Once on the bed, shr turned to face me. We kissed for the first time. All of this time tip-toeing around this moment and at last here we were. Quickly we shed our clothes. Her legs slid around my waist. I felt her smooth skin beneath me. I slid my cock along her pussy feeling the heat along my shaft in stark contrast of the cool of her thighs wrapping around me. The tip of my cock teased her pussy. She said "maybe we shouldn't... don't enter me yet. Let's go slow" I let my cock slide along her slit. Our mouths met again. She ground her pussy against my shaft. I took a nipple into my mouth. She whimpered. I could feel my tip slide down to her lips. She whimpered again powerless to stop herself. I felt her heat slide around my tip. Her face was a mix of conflict and desire. My cock pulsed uncontrollably slipping a little more inside each time. She started to say something but another pulse caught her breath. Her eyes said both yes and no at the same time. Her legs pulled me deeper settling the debate. Finally she found her voice and said, "I'm not ready for this". Surprisingly, as these words escaped her lips, her body rocked subtly against mine. Her lust had firm control over her body. I slowly pulled myself away. I could feel her wetness covering me as I pulled out. She pushed me over onto my back. In a quick move she threw her legs over me spinning her body to face me backwards. She lowered her pussy to my mouth. Her hand grasped my cock. I dove my tongue deep into her pussy causing her to quiver...

Then it got weird. We were in a hotel room with another family. They seemed to be of a fundamentalist variety. We knew them through friends of friends. There were about 8 kids. We were supposed to travel somewhere with them. All of the kids piled into a passenger van, clearly a "smart" mode of transportation for a family so large. There were a lot of "Praise this" and "glory" to that as we all buckled in. I looked at Sandy confused and thrilled by what almost was...

And this is where I woke up. Damnit!!

My weekend was boring as hell. My Dr. called me early Saturday morning to come see him about my elbow. Friday afternoon and night was not good for me. My elbow started throbbing after lunch Friday. The boss told us to cut out early. I stopped by the drugstore and filled the prescription of painkillers the ER gave me. I tried to hold out until 6pm before I took any. But it was hurting worse than it did in the ER by 5. So I went ahead and took a pill. Didn't help. I took a couple of ibuprofen at 9. Nothing. I took a 2nd prescription pill at 10:30ish. Nothing. But it knocked me out. I woke up at 2:30 to more throbbing. Another couple of advil. The Dr. woke me up to tell me to come in. By this point I couldn't close my fingers from swelling.

Unfortunately, he didn't really say anything new. He did drop the F-bomb as it pertains to the specislists. Evidently, they are in no real hurry to see me and it is pissing him off royally. He did say I'm out of commission for at least 4 weeks. More if I end up needing surgery. Considering the earliest I can get in to see a specialist is 3 wks... I'm betting longer. Argh..

The Dr. is over in Sandy's neck of the woods. I stopped by just to shoot the shit for a few. She invited me to stay for lunch but I've been trying to be good. I only stayed for a little bit.

And then boredom set in. Mrs and C cancelled their plans so they could "help me". I ended up watching a movie... by myself. Sunday was more of the same. Though, Mrs an I did figure out how to have sex with my arm in a sling. So that was fun for a few minutes.

Ohhh.. I almost forgot. While I was at Sandy's, the BF called. The first 2 times she ignored him. The last time she answered it, but gave him a line oh shit about working on something in her garage and needing to go. She TOTALLY lied about me being over there, a first. Hmmm..

You can call me lefty

I had a fun evening in the ER last night. A guy rolled my elbow back over his knee in karate last night. I heard two quick POP-POPs. Nothing broken. The Dr thinks I may have torn ligaments, muscle, or both. I can't use my right arm at all.

They gave me lortab for the pain. It worked. Or it didn't and I just didn't care. Mrs had a lot of fun with that. She fucked with me incessantly. Especially helping me get my clothes off (I still had on my gi and cup). So what is a stoned Pluff suffering the ridicule of his wife to do? I waited until she got my pants at my ankles and I penis bitch smacked her! heh!

I'm starting to get some of my issues worked out. Things should be returning to "normal" around here soon. Thanks to everybody who sent me e-mails. I'm ok. Often times we blog about what stands out most in our lives and it tends to... magnify the issues to people who read, but aren't aware of every day stuff to see how significant or not an issue really is. So yeah, I've been depressed about money and my "tendencies" sn actions. But it's something I AM getting through. And blogging about it helps. So do my friends I've met here. Again, Thank You.

I'm gonna cut this short. I have more stuff to say, but I can only type with one hand and... well... we all know how lazy I am. Fortunately, I'm... ahem... left handed for... ahem SOME things ;)

Monday Blah...

I have only had a few people play the last couple of Truth or Dares (thank you very much they were most entertaining). So I guess I'm gonna let it go the way of all semi-amusing yet unpopular ventures. Tho, as I have no copyrights or even original claims on the idea, I am not the end-all of host-meisters of the Truth or Dare variety.

As a follow-up to last Friday's post, I have been pondering the meaning of it all. Thank you commenters online and off. I really appreciate the supportive words.

I think what is happening at the moment, is a confluence of stresses. I am making a very tough decision about my finances. I don't see resolution in the near future, but I am going to have some discussions that will hopefully take me in the right direction.

I hear everyone's comments about Sandy. I traveled for a day trip to mid-state-city to shoot a quick little match Saturday. My intentions started off most honorable. But I can't help myself. I have to talk shit. Shit talking leads to flirting. Flirting leads to me sitting on her couch for an hour and a half... a couple of drinks. Her feet ended up in my lap. I rubbed her feet.. her calves.. then I said I had to go. A few times I caught her looking at me while I was rubbing. While weak, I think I showed some resolve to leave when I did. I'll come back to Sandy, but that is how things ended Saturday.

BK, well, yeah BK. Fortunately for both of us, she isn't much of a communicator. We only talk whenever I'm a) at the pool hall or b) setting up a massage. She doesn't really "do" phone talk... or really e-mails either. Though she did send me some pretty sexy pictures of herself in a bikini at the beach and one of her in a thong on all fours. With that situation, I'm just really embarrassed that I got drunk and careless enough to do anything where I could be seen in public. Maybe there is something to the "self-destruction" angle. Maybe not. I don't think I would be much of an introspector (you like that word?) if I didn't entertain the possibility. Mostly, I'm embarrassed that it got back to Chester. I'd probably be perfectly ok flipping off the establishment that is that crowd of people, because really, who cares what they think. But it still was careless and I'm kicking myself for that.

But I'm still thinking...

Hermitude and Reclusism

I am in a weird state. For whatever reason I'm feeling very much like a recluse. Blogging for me is always very personal and a way to release what's inside "safely". Lately I just haven't been "feeling it" though. Having said that, I have been checking up on my fav blogs. As always, they are very sexy and interesting. They make me feel good reading them. I apologize for not commenting though. I really do enjoy each and every one.

I went shooting with Sandy Wed afternoon. My goal since quitting pool has been to either shoot (for practice) or attend karate. I kind of glossed over last Wed night.. or rather the karate part. Mostly because events with BK kind of overshadowed everything else. But that night was a real eye opener. The ass kicking I took at the hands of the adults really has me seriously questioning whether or not to continue. The Sensei said to me "As much as you work out, you shouldn't struggle like you do". And he's right. I don't know why I can't get my cardio to the right level. But it's at a point where I'm afraid I can't go toe to toe with the big boys because of it. After the "main" class was over, the Sensei called all of the juniors aside. One of them is getting prepared for his black belt test. They were going to do a round of all the juniors with him at "test" levels. Translation, full contact. HOLY FUCKING SHIT did they kick the crap out of this kid! I was thinking to myself, "there is no way I could handle adults at full contact like that". For the short term, I have taken Wed. karate off the table as result.

Anyway, Sandy and I went shooting. I had an ok session. Broke my damned gun. It was an easy fix but a kind of a crappy way to end a session. At one point she said "I need to do more crunches" and lifted her shirt showing me her belly. I said "Come here let me see". She walked over, lifted her shirt again so I could feel her stomach. I thought it was kind of.. interesting. To me it seems an awfully.. familiar thing to do. Anyway, after we went to dinner. We started off going to this little sushi place near my house. They were PACKED. So we opted to go to the sushi bar at one of the big hibachi style Japanese places. She told me she was going to "take me to dinner since I didn't go anywhere for Father's day". I ate myself almost into a coma. We had quite a few drinks. After, I debated whether or not to try to go back to her place, or call it a night and head over to the pool hall and see what was up with BK. I'm such a man-whore really. I chose pool.

BK was there with a friend and his family from out of town. She challenged me to shoot a game with her. I obliged. It felt a little weird, encroaching on her friend's time (maybe I'm just being sensitive). So I said "You hang out with your friends. I'll be at the bar if you want to catch up later" and left her with them. Honestly, I felt kind of like people were checking the situation out.

Later, MUCH later she came over and sat with me. We chatted until they started to close the bar. Chester was there pulling his "A" game with another girl. When it was time to go, I walked out with her towards our cars. One of her teammates came out and said "BK, YOU need to go home". We all stood around for a few. The teammate left. I gave BK a hug. She told me she wanted me to take her shooting next week. Then we left.

Yesterday I was home with C. She had some kind of stomach bug thing. Mrs came home around 1ish or so. I ended up falling asleep on the couch. I woke up around 3. Mrs was doing housework. I wandered into the bedroom and started horsing around with her. Things got a little... romantic when I heard my phone "bong... bong" (text message). I went to check it out. It was Chester. He said "Just wanted you to know people were talking about you and BK making out last week". I can certainly see where people got that. Even though we never once kissed. She did that whole teasing thing. But from a distance... I guess that was where the "YOU need to go home" comment came from. I sent back "Didn't... she was just teasing me. Never touched her". He replied "Ok. Just telling you what people were saying". I could really care less what "people" are saying. But I was pretty annoyed. Not because I got "busted" fooling around with BK. But because CHESTER was saying something. I know his motivations, and they have nothing to do with "protecting" me. It's all about the fact the BK turned him down. I have always made a point of letting her come to me instead of me chasing her. Even this past Wed. night, I left her with her friends. She chose to come over. She didn't have to. She hasn't at times. She has told me "I'd love to chat but I have a booty call" and left. So I don't feel bad about "pursuing" someone he was interested in. She chooses to come to me. Honestly, I'm perfectly happy to just smack talk with her. I mean, who am I kidding, if she said "Let's go get naked" I'd probably do it (the whole man-whore thing again). But really I'm fine just talking smack. Which is one of the reasons I was so confused last week. I had accepted that role. Then then whole almost kissing thing happened and I was thinking WTF?!

After the texting, I sat on the couch stewing. I wondered, really what is bothering me about this. Yeah that Chester feels compelled to say something. Like he's giving me a whole "I know something about you" deal. But what else is it.. I don't really care what people think. But I guess that I was careless enough for people to see. AND that nothing really happened. Though you can argue does it really matter if nothing actually happened. It was erotic enough as it was. And it's not like I didn't try to move the extra 1/4" to actually kiss. So it's really only a "technical" difference. And I'm ok with that. But I suppose that people saw me at all is really what's bugging me.

Now that I'm typing this, it's really coming together. I'm torn by the fact that I don't want to hurt Mrs and by being careless the risk is higher I will. I wonder why do I really feel compelled to have extra-curriculars at all. I honestly wonder how long can I keep up a charade with Mrs. Am I seeking out "fun" as I call it because deep down I want things to blow up with Mrs?

Here's the really fucked up thing of it all. I walked back into the bedroom. Feigned going into the bathroom and at the last second, turned and pounced on Mrs. And we had a nooner. Nothing fancy. But it was good. And after I couldn't stop thinking about what would happen if she knew about everything else.

To make matters worse on the WTF scale, Sandy called as I was on my way to karate last night. She does stuff like this all the time. We were talking. She was telling me about how frustrated she was with work and her BF's apparent non-interest in moving forward with the relationship blah blah when she blurted out "I need to get laid this weekend". What the hell was that? She's too "prim and proper" to generally say those things. Shock value I assume. But to what end? Keep me on the hook? An invitation? Was the whole feel the belly thing an opening? My mind is all a whirl.

Truth or Dare #7 - Results

Post 'em if ya got 'em!!

Truth:

Let me preface this by saying this is a funny game. If you have something you are currently under indictment for or some other serious legal problem.. then maybe you shouldn't answer this. It's all in fun.

What is the most trouble you have ever been in with the law?

Hmm... well there was this one time in college when I got busted trying to use a fake ID. The thing that really sucked was, on that particular night, I was with a "date". She wasn't much of a drinker. I was really only using it to get in without the dreaded "Under 21 mark" on my hand. I didn't really want to drink because a) I was broke and b) there was a band. It was always insane trying to get to the bar and well.. I didn't really do crowds back then any more than I do now.

This other time, also in college, I was home for the weekend. A HS buddy of mine used to work for his Dad, who happened to own a liquor store. His deal was he could take anything he wanted as long as he paid for it. So we took advantage of that quite often. He was learning to play tennis at the time. There were some tennis courts at the high school. The city had also built a recreational park just across the street from the HS. There were a few baseball fields, peewee football fields, a field house, and a track that went around the whole thing. We actually did start off playing tennis. It was dark by the time we got finished. He had taken a HUGE jug of wine from his Dad's store. We rode around for a while drinking. But a) my hometown is incredibly small, there's only so much riding around and b) we decided to "play it smart" and not drink and drive. We went back to the parking lot of the HS. Since we had actually been playing tennis, we both had on gym shorts.. no pockets. Again, it was a small town. We didn't have anything valuable. So we shoved the keys under the seats, grabbed the wine and took off around the track. The track was about 3/4 of a mile all the way around all of the fields. Far enough that we couldn't see the car for about 1/2 of the walk. We came up over a hill, smashed, and saw a police car next to our car. The cop was out shining his light in the windows.. then we saw him open the door. Being drunk and stupid we panicked thinking about the fact we were drinking underage. There was a chain link fence separating the fields and track from some woods. We pulled the bottom of the fence up, scooted under, and hid in the woods. The cop made a 1/2 assed attempt to walk the track. But gave up LONG before he got to us. We watched him go back to our car, fiddle with the door, then leave. We waited about 10 minutes, then scooted back under the fence. Of course we held onto the wine. The cop left after all. When we got back to the car, we found it locked with a note to come to the police station to pick up the keys. Ok I was drunk... but this genius clearly didn't think that through. We're in a small town. The HS was a good 5 miles if not more from town. And he TOOK THE FUCKING KEYS. We sat around for a few minutes trying to think of what to do. Finally, there was nothing else to do but to walk. We got about a mile down the road when my Mom came pulling up. She was 1/2 pissed 1/2 chuckling. "Where the hell were you?! Do you know the POLICE called the house?! They found the car!!" We lied "Yeah, we decided to take a run after playing tennis. We saw the cop at the car but we couldn't get back in time. He left and left us the damned note". She said "Well get in the car. We'll go back to the house and figure out the key situation". It is important to note at this point that I lived in a region famous for a few things. One of which is the bright red and orage mud EVERYWHERE. It wasn't until I got back to the house and walked into the bathroom that I saw why my Mom was 1/2 chuckling. Both of us were covered in red clay all over our backs where we scooted under the fence.

She went and picked up the keys from the police station pointing out how stupid it was to take our keys and strand us. It really was a small town. Think Andy and Barney at the PoPo station.

Dare:

You must use some form of food during sexual activity.

My intention was to do this last night. But things at the Pluff household took a bad turn last night. The key phrase in this one was "during sexual activity"... that would require sexual activity... not happening last night for sure.




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Edit - I'm probably breaking a gazillion blogger rules by continuously adding to this post. But I wanted to make sure people who played ToD could find the appropriate post today. Anyhoo.. I decided to play Wednesday Weirdness. So here goes:

1. Have you ever ridden in a stolen car? What would you do if, in the middle of going somewhere, found out that the driver had stolen the car you were riding in?

Nope. At least not that I'm aware of. I know for sure I would ask to get out. I have way too many responsibilities. Plus any strike against me of this nature would impact my redneck sport of choice... as in no more participation.


2. What is the most amount of money you've spent in a sex shop or porn store at one time? If you've never been to a porn store or sex shop, why?

I think I paid $60ish for the vibe I bought for HF.


3. What is the most annoying thing about one of your closest friends?

That she hasn't slept with me??? LOL! Oh other than that.. see here's the problem. I don't really make friends that well. So I wouldn't really say I have many "close" friends. And my "closest" friend right now is someone I am completely infatuated with. Not sure if she should count. But I'll take a stab using her as my "friend" anyway. I would have to say that, as strong of a woman as she is, there are a lot of parts of her life I want to shake her and say "Just do it". She CAN do anything she wants. But she is often "too scared" to do things for fear of breaking something or messing up.


4. Have you ever taken someone's prescription medication with or without them knowing and used it for recreational purposes?


Nope. I hate taking drugs for myself. Even when I took the codeine for my cough back when I had the flu it gave me a headache. I still have vicodin(sp?) left over from minor surgery I had on my neck a few years ago. Don't touch the stuff. Not even when I broke my toe (and tried to set it myself).

5. What is at least one thing you are you insecure about?

Oh for the love of... just ONE?!?! At the moment, my very existence. It hasn't been a secret that I'm struggling with my whole self-worth ever since the job from hell fiasco. Financial troubles in the last month haven't really helped. I've been putting on a smiley face here, occasionally venting. But it hasn't been good lately.

6. What are some things that you prefer to do alone?


Masturbate? Again.. the list is SOOOooo long. I'm a loner really. I love times when Mrs and C are out of the house. I hate to say it, but there are times when I'm cringing on the inside that I'm sharing my space. I love doing things like yard work, or even something as mundane as making ammo for a match because it's time for me to think. And as I'm no intellectual, I need all the time a resources possible for that.

7. How would you react if you found out the anonymous babe who writes all your favorite sexy posts on her blog is really your mother?

I think I just threw up a little in my mouth. WORSE, what if you started commenting, e-mailing, chatting, set up a clandestine meeting... *shudder*... let us never bring this up again!

TMI #140 Less One

It's toosday... you know what that means. Time for me to open the old filing cabinet, dust off the folders that make up the creature called Pluff... Yup TMI Tuesday time!

1. What's your favorite color of lingerie?

It depends. What color are you wearing?

2. Do you have a porn collection?

Ha! Well.. what constitutes a collection? Video > 1? Video of actual porn? Let's assume we mean "other than what I've downloaded". I think I'd have to go with ZERO. We have a DVD that Mrs bought as "porn". But A) she wouldn't go into an adult store to buy it because she was so embarrassed and B) she bought it off of amazon. Can you see where this is headed? Anyway, it's R rated at best. They "cleverly" hold their legs or lamps or other "view blockers" in the frame so you can see boobs and that's it. If a girl is going down on another, it's blocked by something. Anyway I found the post about it in the archive if you so choose to click


3. Do you have any fetishes?

Only the "for the love of god fuck me before I explode" fetish.

4. What is your favorite place to have sex?

It depends. Where are you?

Heh I crack myself. I can tell you my least favorite place lately has been the bed. MY bed. It's just so... the same.

5. Do you like to scratch, bite, pull hair, etc? Do you like having it done to you?

Meh. But if I know it's a real turn on I'll do it.. in the moment and all I supposed it adds.

Bonus (as in optional): Do you think the number of sexual partners you've had is below average, average, or above average, and how does that make you feel?

I would say it's probably average. You have the serial monogamists and the man-whores. I'd say I fall in the middle.

And there ya have it! Be sure to go play at:



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Also a reminder we're playing Truth or Dare this week. It's not too late to play. Check out the rules here:

Here's to Pioneers

CNN Headline - "Lesbian pioneers' marriage decades in making"

Gonna preface this with saying that I think it's awesome they've been together for 55 years and the following is not a statement on the issue at hand or really relevant.

I first read the headline and thought for just a split second "Wha?... Pioneers? LEEEZbian Pioneers?! Whatever could they have pioneered!!" Keep in mind these thoughts raced through my head in a matter of microseconds. In my head - "Perhaps a new position?... maybe the cousin to the G spot.. an H spot.. I spot.. A new tongue twist? Maybe a way to stimulate the clit, G spot, and the mysterious H spot with one specialized flick of the tongue. Ooh or maybe a new position. Or did they invent 'scissors'. Maybe they wrote a book. Could I learn something? Could I be called a 'Paduan'" This is where the sensible part of my brain, with a complete WTF look, SMACKS ME IN THE FOREHEAD!!

And thus ends our little glimpse into the ongoing party up in the Pluffatorium!

Be sure to send me your Truth or Dare preferences.

T-I-double GRRRR baby!! and Truth or Dare #7

Yeah not so much.

Had a decent weekend. The local gang went to mid-state city to shoot. Just a little monthly thing. I finished well. 3rd in my division of 17, 1st in my class of 6. Woot! It was a little weird because we usually go to a burger joint and hang with the other shooters afterwards. This time one of the girls in our little caravan just wanted to hit fast food and beat feet. We got back to town MANY hours before normal. Sandy asked if I wanted to come over to her place for a cocktail. Who am I to argue. Nothing good. I got there and she decided she needed to run some errands. So was basically her surrogate bag carrier, cart pusher. Went home and passed out.

Daddy's day was ok. My daughter had her annual dance recital. I don't know what possessed them to think this is what we want, but the idea is it's "your little girl's present to you Daddy". Yeah whatever. Don't get me wrong. I am so very proud of her and I love watching her do the things she loves. But to make a "pretense" it's for the Daddy's... come on. Give me a beer, a steak, and a nap (Momma can give me a blow job) and it's a perfect day for me. Drag my ass out in public where I have to interact with... *shudder*... people... and be nice... and try not to kill any of the ID10Ts.. yeah no. They never once mentioned Father's the whole time either. But it was for my little girl. Nothing much else special. C got me a video of a show on one of the big cable channels featuring my favorite sport. Oh.. and I'm actually in the video for about .75 seconds. Building my 10 minutes .7 seconds at a time baby!! 'Cause that's how I rooOOOlll! Sadly, no steak (though it was a lovely dinner), no beer, and no BJ from Mrs. Sigh.. Of course it's probably my own fault. Mrs had a whole thing arranged at a Hibachi place. Thankfully she mentioned it Friday. I said "Sweetie I really appreciate the thought, but do you REMEMBER Mother's Day?! ME?! PUBLIC?! CROWDS?! WAITING?!... and I'm ARMED!" She was giggling when she canceled the reservations but seriously.. take me out any other day.. but you know every restaurant in town was slammed yesterday.

So that was that... another boring weekend in the life of the Pluffster...


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It's Monday... you know what day that is? No not that? Hmph or THAT?!... Well... maybe that... but it's definitely Truth or Dare Day!!! Streamers... sexy music.. and stuff.

Hopefully my e-mail troubles have been fixed by switching to the new address pluffmudinsouth@gmail.com. I sincerely apologize if you tried to play and I didn't respond. Yahoo was sending some mails off into the bit bucket.

The game is simple. Shoot me an e-mail with your preference, truth, dare, or both. I'll respond with the appropriate challenge. Hold your answers until Wednesday so people have to make their own choice... and maybe just sweat a little... On Wed. post your answers/proof. For dares "proof" is up to you. Story, picture, third party, be creative. Click on the button below for more detailed rules. So... ready? Come on.. it's fun...

Truth or Dare?

Uhhh.. Like Holy F@#$*ing Shit!!.. and ToD or Something

First... let me preface with I'm drunk.. So this should be funny if nothing else.

Second.. I'm not exactly sure what the hell just happened. I'm somewhat confused... but let me back up. I actually did my dare and, by extension have an HNT as both my proof and.. my HNT submission.. but WHAT... FUCKING... EVER... Event's have SO overshadowed both of those... Ok... back up...

The evening started off with my usual internal debate as to what to do with my Wed. night. My choices are a) go to karate b) go shoot c) hope Sandy will be up for something or d) go hang out at the pool hall and hope BK is around.

I waited and waited hoping Sandy would call. She didn't. I reluctantly decided to go to karate. I figured if I didn't hear from her I could go hang out and have a beer or two after I was finished.

Wed. nights are for the "big boys". It is spar night. Which means all formalities go out the window and you simply pair up and go at it. I noticed as soon as I walked in there were an unusual number of people from other Dojos and they seemed to be... really.. young. This class is not for kids. So when I say young, I mean the youngest is around 16.

We started without the usual fanfaire (typical of this class). Partner up and go. I ended up with a Junior. The last few times we have sparred I worked him over pretty good. He didn't know what to do with me. The few times he tried making moves I ended up blocking him with my elbow ultimately hurting him. Tonight, he was different. He was aggressive. Prepared for whatever I had to throw at him. I'd call it a stalemate, but entirely different from the last time we sparred. And of course my fat ass was sucking wind by the time we were done.

Next guy, another kid I usually work over. He evidently just got his black belt. I congratulated him before class and he was all smiles. Same deal. He had extra snap to his kicks and punches. We inadvertantly ended up on the floor. When I fall, I always grab my opponenent and bring them down with me. He either grabbed my leg or I got hold of him defensively and we ended up falling. I quickly grabbed him in a choke hold and he wisely tapped before I put pressure on him.

The next guy was yet another junior. But he's almost an adult. And he's REALLY good. He's a kicker (as opposed to a puncher)... right up my alley.. except I'm stil an old fat ass. He really showed me how much I'm behind the curve. I hung in there. But I'd say he got the better of me. Again, we ended up on the floor and I ended up sitting on his chest. He said "DO something..." I was thinking.. "Dude, I'm on your chest... I don't want to kick your ass... or worse set myself up for an ass kicking" I said "Dude I got nothing.. I ended up here by accident" and I got off of him. He really put it to me after that.

Which finally brings me to the adults. I sparred a guy who is a friend of Chester's. I've heard things about him. But I have never ended up with him. I tried to go really easy... slow.. throwing light stuff. I was so winded by this point I really just wanted to try to work technique. I saw it coming. He hit me with a fucking kick that almost knocked the wind out of me. Ok one for him. I backed up... went slow... BAM!! another one... I thought "I wonder if he's mad because I kept taking the juniors down?"... BAM! another... and another...and another. I was so winded I couldn't really prep my stomach so at least 2 caught me unprepared and doubled me over. I started getting pissed. After about 10 more of those we stopped. I tried my best to look him in the eye and thanked him after we bowed. But I thought "WTF was that?!"

Then it REALLY got serious. The head Sensei called me to spar with him. Things started off slow.. but as usual he worked me over pretty good. By the end I was just trying to hold on. He kicked me really fucking hard in the nuts... or rather.. he WOULD've kicked me in the nuts except I got a hand down to try to block. He pinned my own arm between his heel and my nuts.. HARD.

Ok so the stage is kind of set. By the time I left I was thinking "WTF am I doing this for?! I'm just getting my ass kicked and I'm not learning..." I decided to go have a beer or two after and ponder.

I was sitting there kind of feeling yet again, when it really counts I'm coming up short. Just like fucking money.. just like.. on and on.

Then I saw BK. She saw me. Ran over and put her arm around me saying "DUDE!! I am SO glad to see you.. I totally lost your number.. you HAVE to give it to me!" I sent it to her e-mail via the crackberry. We caught up briefly then she had to get back to her team.

About 30 minutes later, I had some food and decided to walk around. Who was BK playing? Chester's team. I saw him. We chatted. I fucked with him a little. Then I went over to BK. We hung out and talked some more. She started falling behind on scorekeeping so I decided to go back to the bar and let her finish. They were on their last match anyway. As I walked away she said "Please don't leave. Hang out with me tonight". You know my answer.... who am I to argue with that.

Cut to about 30 minutes later. She came over to the bar and sat next to me. Honestly, the conversation was a blur. We talked about all kinds of stuff. Her team mates had taken up residency at the end of the bar. Ocassionally they would send her a shot and make her go do it with them. Bonus for me.. THEY'RE getting her drunk.

I honestly don't know where we ended up.. or how we got there (conversation wise). I could barely hear her above the music in the bar. But I could pick up a definite.. sexual undertone to the conversation. She paid her tab. I took that as my cue.

We walked to her car. She threw her cue in. This is where the record in my head skips.. She leaned towards me to tell me about something her captain said as we were leaving. I honestly don't remember what he said. I said "Yeah whatever... let's get back to what you said to me before we left..." She leaned in and gave me a hug and for the life of me I'm cursing my years in the band because I DON'T FUCKING KNOW WHAT SHE SAID... and I damned sure wasn't going to ask her to repeat because... we were holding each other.. close. REAL close. Mouths almost touching. I started to pull away and she did this whole.. I'm gonna kiss you no I'm not thing... Think the "force field game" from Stripes. Our noses were side by side. Our mouths almost but not.. quite... touching... Our mouths circled each other shadow boxing... almost kissing.. lips just brushing but not quite. I leaned in as if to force the issue and she quickly pulled back. So I thought.. "ok... I can do this". I held myself so close but I didn't make a move. Her mouth moved to my neck. I could almost feel her lips as her hot breath washed over my neck. I felt my cock grow stiff. I felt her mouth close on my neck. Her tongue danced back and forth over my skin. I tried to lean down to her neck but she pulled away, returning to my neck after I backed off. After a few minutes she broke away and brought her mouth up to mine and again.... held just... short... My right hand was around her waist. I slid my left hand to the front of her belly. She was wearing jeans with a long t-shirt tucked in the front. My left hand wrapped itself in her t-shirt and deliberately pulled her to me. It was a strong move.. no doubt she was coming to me. With my hand wrapped tight I pressed her body to mine. We continued the dance with our mouths...

Finally I looked away. She pulled back... I don't know why.. but I walked away. I think I muttered something like "Good GAWD girl... you SO know how to push my buttons". It's still foggy but I think I muttered "Goodnight" and I got in my truck with a RAGING boner...

And so I'm wondering WTF was that?!? Was she just fucking with me because she was drunk.. more? What the hell do I do next? It was SO unexpected.

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Ok day after and I've had time to think. Nothing really new to add except I remember more of the conversation... kind of. I still am cursing the constant ringing in my ears because I only heard about 1/2 of what she was saying. So maybe I completely misread things... but here is how we got there..

We started to hug as if to leave. It was a long hug. She buried her head in my chest. I looked down at her and this is how we ended up face to face. She looked up and moved close as if to kiss me. So I'd say she initiated but I put myself in the position to either invite or creep her out. I guess it was the first.

We never did actually kiss or anything. She did nibble and suck on my neck for just a minute. But that was it. When we pulled apart just a little, she said "You know what I'm going to do when I get home..." I said "Well be sure to think of this when you do... 'cause I know *I* am... oh and *I* will..." I'm presuming she meant masturbate. It is no secret she gets herself off before and after pool.

I remember thinking not to push things. She could just be teasing. And even if not, the tension is kinda fun and who knows... So I think this is when I muttered something like "Good GAWD you know how to push my buttons" and I walked off. She said something, and for the life of me I don't know what. I looked at her with my usual shit eating grin but kept walking to my truck. Maybe she invited me to her place... maybe she just said "this is as close as you get"... no idea.

When we were talking earlier she made it very clear she doesn't do married guys. We were talking about a booty call she had the last time I saw her out at pool. Don't think I blogged about it but about 3 weeks ago I went out after karate. She as there. Bought her a shot or two. Then she ran up and was almost giddy saying "Gotta run for a booty call". Anyway, we were talking about that and she told me she found out after he was married. She was pretty pissed about it and said she won't talk to him. Which of course in my usual "it's all about me" thing I twisted to "So I'm SO out of the picture then huh?!" I always knew this and pretty much approached her with a "hey we're just having fun shooting the shit" kind of way anyway. And I have seen her tease guys with her little booty shake stripper thing. Which is why the whole almost kiss thing really threw me. Maybe she was totally fucking with me. I dunno.

Truth or Dare #6 - Results

Ok! Post 'em if you got 'em!!

Before I get to mine, I have an important note. I will be changing my e-mail address. It seems several e-mails to the pluffster haven't made it. Don't know if yahoo's spam filter is catching it or not. But I'm switching to gmail. My new address is:

pluffmudinsouth at gmail dot com

Sorry for any trouble this may have cause and really... REALLY.. I'm not ignoring you. (here comes the sappy music) sniff.. sniff.. because.. I don't get to talk to people.. sniff.. much and sniff.. I MIIISSS YOU!! WAAAAAIIILLL!!! ;)

Anyhoo... back to the shooo...

Truth:

What is the most embarassing thing your parents have ever seen you do?

Gee the list is long on this one. There were the drunken falling on my ass moments... There were hormonally induced boners at horribly inappropriate times...

I guess one that tops the list was once when I was about 7 or 8 I was staying at my Grandparents house. They had a 4 car garage with a HUGE room up over it. I was up there by myself playing and for whatever reason, decided to take my clothes off. My Grandfather poked his head up to tell me it was time for dinner. I think I had the whole deer in headlights thing.

Of course a close 2nd was this one time.. in New Orleans.. when the same Grandparents dragged me through all the strip joints on Bourbon St. but I'll save that juicy little piece of hell for another time.

Dare:

You must expose a naughty bit while driving for 30 seconds. Let's not get in any wrecks doing this though mkay...

Ack!! This one has been a little tough to do since I've been riding the motorcycle daily. I can picture someone pulling up next to me at a red light, looking over and.... "It.. IT.. out.. OUT!!" I had every intention of doing this one on the way to work this morning. But I completely forgot and I left my camera for proof. I WILL get back on this one though.

And there you have it... another rousing episode of Truth or Dare

TMI Tuesday One Thoity Eht

Yup it's that time where we brace ourselves against the door of the closet that is our brains, and while keeping the piles of crap we've been shoving in there from tumbling out and burying us in an avalanche of irrelevant ccccththththtrrraAAAP (scottish tongue roll if you didn't catch that), we fish around and blindly pull out the dusty disused facts for our consumption!! Otherwise known as TMI Tuesday.

1. If you're in love with your partner, does it make the sex better?

Passion makes all the difference. Whether it's blind lust or love. I've had both (blind lust and love) and it was most definitely the passion that made the difference.

2. What is the most expensive sex toy you've ever purchased?

Hmm... let's count the number of toys I've purchased. 2. TWO. One for Mrs as kind of a half joke half serious thing for about $30 and one for HF for about $60. So I guess the rabbit at $60 would be the winner.

3. If you knew ahead of time you would not have an orgasm, would you still have sex?

Not have an orgasm?! What the hell are you talking about?!?! I'm a DUDE. It is almost a forgone conclusion. Having said that, there were times when I haven't been able to cum (but I tried and tried for hours and hours). And there were times where I wasn't sure if I had it in me to cum. Hard enough for sex yes... but not altogether... into it. And I forged ahead. So I guess the answer is yes. But in the times I wasn't sure if I could finish, I did. And the times I couldn't, it never crossed my mind that I wouldn't until I didn't and got tired.


4. What celebrity would you most like to have sex with if given the chance?

Angelina Jolie... though it changes depending on what I saw last night. Ask me again tomorrow. I would've said Jessica Alba.. but something about the thought that she JUST had a baby like yesterday... Maybe in a couple of months she'll be back at the top of the list (though I'm all for Angelina pregnant... hmmm...interesting).

5. Have you ever had sex while an audience watched?

Not on purpose. C walked in while we were in a very compromising position... but that hardly counts. I'm always up for trying new things tho... I'll need a) and audience and b) a lovely volunteer... anyone... anyone... Beuller...


Bonus (as in optional): Describe the best sexual encounter you've ever had.

Hmmm there are two that are a tie... the first was with Mary Ann in college. She was a year or two older than me. We went back to my dorm room and I had one of those hours of brilliance where I could've literally fucked all night. And we did. For hours. In every position imaginable.. until some asshat set off a fire alarm and we had to evacuate the building.

Second was with Married Woman. The first time in fact. I posted about it before. But the synopsis is, went to happy hour with a bunch of co-workers. The group whittled away until it was just the 2 of us. We ended up kissing. She went home. I felt guilty (because she was married). She full court pressed me for weeks after. One day I was home working when she showed up. We sat on the couch "talking". She made a move. We kissed... kissing turned to groping.. groping turned to my hand down her panties.. we went to my room. It was fast and furious and intense. Passion. Like #1 above. We couldn't get enough of each other. Nothing fancy. It wasn't like she was swinging from the ceiling fan while I jumped from an exercise trampoline or anything. Just straight up sex. But we tried our best to melt together.




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Stuff suffering from financial induced depression. I paid bills yesterday and came up short. When I look at my spending since payday there was about $80 you could call "frivolous". Lunch. Pizza with Sandy. The rest was for gas and the battery for the MC for a total of about $250. And I'm short for bills. I feel so frustrated right now. Mrs and I are seriously considering downsizing. But now just isn't the right time. I don't want to dump the house in a down market (just like with the stock market.. do the opposite of what I do). But this SUCKS being house poor.

Elsewhere in Pluffland, one of my favorite bloggers abruptly shut down. I don't know what the circumstances are. I respect her privacy so I'm not going to ask or pry. She and I did exchange e-mails. I certainly hope nothing I said or sent had anything to do with it. I don't want to make things worse by sending her anything either.

Maybe I've just been lucky. Perhaps I am as clever as I'd like to think. Who knows. But this blog has been something I have kept to myself in Pluffland. Only 1 person I know in real life has ever seen this site (that I know of) and, while the outcome of her visit was most pleasurable, I still am nervous knowing she knows. But as a rule, I don't talk about this site or mention the fact that I blog. Period. I've been doing this for about 4.5 years and I did have a scare once when I left the site up overnight on my laptop. I very quickly shut it down to a blank page with the statcounter and watched for any activity scaring me. A couple of times I have seen IP's close to home. It probably wouldn't take a real genius to find me.

Having said all that. My best wishes goes out to her. I hope things work out.

Lastly, we're playing ToD. If you're intersted shoot me an e-mail with what you want to play, truth, dare, or both.

Truth or Dare #6

Happy Monday morning!! It's time for Truth or Dare!! The rules are pretty simple. If you wish to play, shoot me an e-mail telling me which you want to play, truth, or dare (or both if you want, but you have to DO both). Keep it a secret so other people out in blogland can fret over which to choose. On Wed, post results. Click on the fancified button below for "official" rules. Proof of dares is all in the creative talents of you the participant. So far we've had audio, video, stories. It's all in fun. Got it? Her we go:

Truth or Dare?







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My weekend was a mix of hectic and laid back. We shot a local match saturday. The person who usually is in charge of these things was out of town and asked me if I'd run it. No problem. But HOLY SHIT! what a lot of work. I ran up to the range after work Fri. and spent several hours setting it all up. THEN I ran back up at the butt crack of dawn to finish (since we ran out of daylight). The match actually went pretty well. We were done in record time. Not so much a measure of my ability to run things as much as I made all of the stages pretty simple and fast. Good thing because the heat index was into triple digits.

I wish I had something juicy and salacious, but I finished the match (did really well). Busted ass tearing down. Then went home and passed out for about 3 hours. I was WHIPPED! Mrs finally poked me in the butt around 6:30 and asked "Are you gonna get up or what?!" Dehydration, extreme heat all conspired to make me very... creaky. I hobbled around like an old man the rest of the night.

Sunday I pressure washed the front and back porches. Again the heat index was into triple digits. I lounged around and "recovered" the rest of the day.

And there you have it. A day in the life of the weekend of Pluff. Exciting huh?

Sometimes you're just treadin

Sorry no HNT today (wait.. scratch that... changed my mind at the last second). I am on-call this week. The last 2 nights have been rough. Not so much the level of activity. Moreso that I was blissfully asleep when my pager first started going off. It only took me a few minutes to resolve/address the problem. But 2 hours later I was still staring at the ceiling unable to fall back asleep.

Last night it was like the sleep gods were conspiring to keep me up all night. 2am I got the first page. I crawled out of bed and staggered to the office to deal with it. 15 minutes later I was back in bed. Somewhere around 3:30 I looked at the clock... still awake. I fell into an uneasy sleep somewhere after that. Then at 5am... Mrs alarm started going off. First, she is off work today and tomorrow with C for her first few days of summer vacation. Second, music won't wake her up. The annoying EEEERP EEERP EEERP!! sound won't wake her up either. So she does both. At full volume. So at 5am it went off. Did she turn it off? Nnoooooo... she hit snooze. 5 minutes later.. "HEEEY IT'S 5:05AM EERP EEERP TIME FOR A EEERP EEERP CHECK OF THE EEERP EEERP WEATHER!!!" I have a horrible fight/flight reflex when I'm sleeping. I can handle the alarm. I can handle the radio. Something about them both combined has me springing into action ready to fight some REAAALLY annoying beeping DJ sounding monster. My adrenaline was pumping and I was about to jump out of the bed. She hit snooze again. 5:10am... you guessed it... alarm. I finally yelled at her "WOULD YOU TURN THAT FUCKING THING OFF GOD DAMNIT!!!"

Around 5:40ish I was just nodding off when my pager went off again. We use an automated problem detection system. Every so often you get false alarms. A system doesn't respond fast enough, or there is a hiccup with timing or whatever. I have learned to take note, and keep watch to see if it corrects itself. This particular system is getting a little long in the tooth. It should've been retired by now. Except politics and poor project management have kept it around in a state of limbo. We're not willing to spend $$ to maintain it because it's "going away".. and yet it hasn't. So for whatever reason, all of this information came tapping on the inside of my skull whispering "Don't go back to sleep just yet... what if this is for real.. it IS old.. it IS about time for a failure". I contemplated getting out of bed to actually check on the system. Keep in mind I was 1/2 asleep so contemplating is requiring WAY more cycles than it should. Just as I was about to get up my pager went off again "Nevermind... false alarm... sleep well". Yeah not so much.

Switching gears... heh appropriately so. I rode the motorcycle today for the first time in about 9 months. Towards the end of last summer I noticed the front tire was getting a little... bald. Usually this would give me just a little pause. But around here, summer = thunderstorms. Bald tires and rain = wreck. Around the same time my parking arrangements at work became much more manageable. I used to park about 1/2 mile away from my building. However, we have motorcycle parking that is much closer. I could kill several birds by riding the bike. Better gas mileage. Better parking. Better commute. But once I got closer parking the bald tire seemed to make it all a wash.

Later, I got my new truck with almost twice the mileage of the old (not saying much). Finally, I got even better parking. In the same garage as the motorcycle parking. So the bike languished unused. I always seemed to find something else to spend money on rather than replacing the bald tire.

Now, with warmer weather and outrageous gas prices the bike was calling my name. However, the months of neglect had taken a minor toll on the bike. Dead battery. Of course mine can't use the $29.99 battery. It needs the $69.95 battery. I broke down and bought one yesterday and now have the bike back in "running" condition. The tire is still bald. But the forcast for today and tomorrow are almost 0% chance of rain. I'm taking a calculated risk and rode. Let me just say... AAAAaaaahhhh... I missed that.

By now you should all know almost everything I do has some sort of sexual undercurrent. I really was planning to get the bike back in shape. But this week, I got an e-mail out of the blue from HF. We have exchanged a few e-mails... mostly just chit-chat. I told her about quitting pool and suggested maybe we should grab a beer sometime. She is still working multiple jobs and has next to no time. But she did say she might have some time in the next couple of weeks. Oh how I DO love having her pressed against my back on the bike. It adds just a hair more... incentive to get it in top shape.

Ya know what... I was just inspired for an HNT after all. Not very juicy. It was back in my "fatter" days. But here it is.

Truth or Dare #5 - Results

This week's Truth or Dare, is a little bit naughty and a little bit nice. The nice part was inspired by my Daughter. I know it's goofy but I thought it was hilarious. Anywhoo... here are mine.

Truth:

Have you ever hit on someone you really shouldn't have? I.e. best friend's wife... Priest... Boss' Daughter. Tell us about it. What was the outcome?


I think the list pretty much covers any female of the species I come in contact since I married Mrs. But let's try to be more specific. Leave it to me to ask a question I have trouble answering myself...

Ok here's one. When I first split with the ex-Mrs a friend invited me to a New Year's Eve party. It was only the 2nd time I had ever met a lot of the people (other than my friend). There were a few cute girls around. Most of them were taken. One in particular caught my eye. Someone told me she was dating a guy named "John". There were 3 John's at the party. Several drinks and a few hours later, I had forgotten who she was dating. It seems like someone pointed to 1 John and told me he was her ex. In my semi-drunken and horny state, I equated ex-John to her being available after all. I started hitting on her. Big time. There was this REALLY tall dude kinda hanging around. He really didn't seem to care that I was hitting on this girl. Then someone pointed out, THAT's her BF John. I had been seriously laying it on for a good hour with him sitting right there.

Oooh and I just remembered! I used to race sailboats. Little ones. Big enough for 2 people. The ideal crew weight was about 300 lbs and since I push 200... well I need a tiny crew. The ex-Mrs was perfect except after dumping her in the harbor (funny story) and a few other mishaps we learned it's best we didn't sail together. So I shopped around and a girl I worked with offered. She was a newlywed. Cute as hell. She and her husband hung out with us some. We ended up traveling to big city in south for a championship race. We opted to camp on the grounds to save money. We each had a tent. One of the nights, after some associated function, we sat out by the water drinking some form of alcohol or another. The conversation turned to sex (perhaps I steered it.. ME?! Nnoooooo) She mentioned how the ex-Mrs told her I was REALLY good with my tongue. I'm vague on the exact wording... but I think I offered to demonstrate.

Come to think of it that might've been the last time we sailed together. I remember it was towards the end of the season anyway... hmm..


Dare:

You must speak "whale" (a la Dori in Finding Nemo). Write about it Wed. Example below:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=mB6Zyd8xKUg



Obviously if this one was inspired by C I pretty much speak "whale" to her all the time. I tried my best to get her to speak "whale" to her teachers on her last day. hhhHHHHAAAAAaaavveeEEEE a NIIIiiiiUUUOOOOUUUIiiiiiCCCEE ssssUUUUAAAAlalalalala (tongue wag) lalalaaaEEEEeeeerrr"!!



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Thought I would join in and play this whole Wednesday Weirdness craze sweeping blogland :)

1. When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

Ha! I think I've answered this before. But it was a) a fireman or b) Dean Martin... I know I was a weird kid. But it's appropriate to the meme.

2. Do you put ketchup on top of your french fries or on the side to dip in? If you don't use ketchup, what do you use? If you don't eat french fries, what's wrong with you? (Ok so that last one is just a joke. Kind of. *wink*)


I used to put ketchup all over the fries. But then I realized I spent a lot of time licking the ketchup off my fingers. So I started putting it to the side. That and you can salt it.

3. When was the last time you had phone sex? If you've never done it, why?


I almost had phone sex back in April ;) But before that... hmm it would be when I was dating the Ohio girl.. so that would be about... 7.5-8 years ago?

4. When was the last time you made someone cry? What did you do to make them cry?

Geez crying is a regular staple in Pluffland. It doesn't take much to set Mrs off. She's really sensitive. In fact, on Memorial Day one of the news shows did one of those 10 minute salutes to our servicemen fighting overseas. I was upstairs in the office. I heard from downstairs "bff bff buhhuhhh waaaaaahh!!" (crying not laughing). But this is about the last time *I* made someone cry... technically *I* didn't make her cry. But Mrs backed into a mailbox with her car (again) cracking the post and putting a dent in her car. I didn't yell or anything like I did the previous 2 times she backed into something. I did say "I'm not cleaning up your mess. Deal with it". She came running over crying.

5. How often do you sing in the shower?


Shower? Never. Car. All the damned time. I miss being in a band and still think I can sing backing vocals so... Yup I'm the dork you see in the car next to you.

6. Have you ever cooked dinner or any other meal naked? If not, would you?


Yup. Two words. Bacon.. ouch. I haven't cooked naked in a loooong time. The stove in my kitchen is located such that the neighbors have a clear view from their kitchen of mine. We have french doors on the back of the house so it's not like they can only see the upper 1/2. They get the full monty view.

TMI Tuesday One Terdee Seben

I started not to play TMI Tuesday this week because it seems a little... skewed. I'm feeling just a wee bit discriminated against... but then I thought to myself "Self.. you've never been one to back down from a challenge.. or discrimination"... so here goes.

1. How old were you when you first kissed a boy?


Uhhh..... I got nothing. But let's be fair... I was about 13 when I first kissed Dawn. A REAL kiss. We made out in a skating rink. I accidentally touched her boob (really it was an accident!)


2. Who would play you in the movie of your life story?

I'd like to think Jim Carrey or Jack Black. But I think realistically it would probably be the guy from those free credit report dot com commercials. EF ARE EEE EEE that spells FREE... credit report dot com BA-BEE!

3. What is the number one thing your love/hate about gay people?

Honestly, I don't really have anything. I grew up around gay people. To me they have always just been... people. I guess if I had to pick something, and this applies to anyone not just gay people, is when they identify themselves as such. For example, the Pres. of the company from hell wasn't just the company President, she identified herself as a strong business WOMAN. She was proud of the fact she had gone through many relationships in order to be successful. She very much had a "I'm a strong woman and I'm not going to let any man step on me" thing going.

But as we're specifically talking about gay people, there was a friend of a friend hanging out with my old pool team who was a self proclaimed "fag". Same deal with him. A) he made it pretty clear what his preferences were and B) he called himself a "fag" all night. He was a cool guy. Funny as shit. Obviously gay. I didn't understand his need to "identify" himself though. It was as if his insecurities drove this need to fit not only a niche, but one completely the opposite of everyone around him (we were in a redneck pool hall.. ). I just wanted to hang out and have some fun.

Same deal with my gay coworker. Her GF was very active in the Gay and Lesbian Acceptance Alliance. She even took a job with them. Every flippin time we hung out together, she tried her best to tell me I needed to let Mrs fuck me with a strap on. I just always laughed it off. But she was serious. I can't count the nights she and another friend of mine ended up in fights (almost physical) because she just couldn't leave politics and her need to "spread the word" out. I always kind of felt like "got it... next".

But as I said, this can apply to anything, race, gender, sexual preference. Whatever.

4. If you could legally get married to "the fella" - or any fella - would you?

Am I missing some hip vernacular? "the fella"? Or are we being literal? Fella as in literally a guy? Again I'm so confused... A) already married to Mrs.. woman B) not gay so fellas are non-issue. So being hypothetical.. if "straight" marriage had been taboo and now there are amendments and legislature aimed at making it not so, would I marry? I assume we mean would I break the mold (being hypothetically taboo)? Not just for the sake of breaking the mold. I barely wanted to get married as it was. It's not that I'm opposed to the concept. It's just that.. well... I have only a few times felt the angels singing and the skies opening up with rose petal rain blah blah... and they were all nutcases. In fact, the only candidate for a 3rd ex Mrs is also a nutcase too. So I'm starting to learn that when the angels sing... RUN LIKE HELL!! The notion of being legally bound is so.. constricting to me I think it would take a remarkable set of circumstances. But then again isn't true love supposed to be a remarkable set of circumstances?

5. Have you ever worn short short shorts in public?

HA!! Oddly enough the answer to this one is yes. But not on purpose. When I was 18ish or so I worked for my Dad during the summers (construction). Before I would leave for the summer (my Mom and Dad were split up) to his place, my Mom would take all of my school jeans and cut them off for me to wear. Working construction was tough on the shorts... and dirty so they got washed a LOT. You know how shorts tend to fray. My Mom was a little.. aggressive with the scissors on a pair or two. I was a dumb teenager and just put on whatever I had. So yeah they probably qualified. I think my GF in college finally said something about them (because they were perfectly good shorts as far as I was concerned) and I realized without underwear (or drawers as we say in the south) the boy, what little there is of him, peeked.

Bonus (as in optional): Who is your favorite blogger?

Every single one on my sidebar... or they wouldn't be there. I'm too lazy to add links in which I'm only 1/2 interested.

Now... let me go do something a little more... butch! I feel all EXPOSED now!! HAHA!!




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Oh yeah... don't forget Truth or Dare. It's not too late to play.

Truth or Dare #5

Happy Monday! For those in our school district at least, Happy Last Full Day of School!! WOOT!!

This week we return to our regularly scheduled program of mystery and debauchery... It's time for Truth or Dare!!. For those unfamiliar with the rules click on all the linkies throughout the post to see them. The basics are send me an e-mail with your preference. I'll respond in kind. Keep it secret until Wed so everyone gets a chance to sweat and fret over their own choice. Then Wed. we'll reveal. *cracking knuckles* Ready?

Truth or Dare?