If only...

my cock actually got half the action my mouth talks... sigh..

The head guy from my redneck sport for my state is in town for work. Every time he visits we go out and drink and drink and drink. Super cool guy. Last night He, Sandy, and myself went out.

Sandy and I were first to the bar. We were chit chatting about our sport and match schedules. I said "yeah I was going to go to X event but it conflicts with Y". She said "No, Y is on this date", which I know to be wrong. We started to argue about it, playfully of course. I grabbed my crackberry and pulled up the schedule. While pointing out how wrong she was, her hand went to my wrist, presumably to turn the screen towards her. After she looked she left her hand on my wrist. We continued to argue about it. She wouldn't accept she was wrong in spite of overwhelming evidence supporting my position. Her fingers started stroking my arm.

Then John showed up. We had a blast. Drinking.. talking shit. We are all supposed to travel to Mississippi in a couple of weeks for a match. Originally it was going to be Me, John, Sandy, and John's son (heh... originally I made a typo and typed "his John's son".. get it.. his johnson... huhu huh huhuhuhu). Looks like now it's just John, Sandy, and myself. We discussed the trip and our plans. As we are leaving on a Thurs night we will probably stop in Atlanta. Evil schemes came to mind. A trip to the Cheetah came up. To my astonishment Sandy said "Ok!" This is the same person who has said "HEEELLL no!" when I brought the subject up before. Hmmm.. we'll see.

Not much else happened. We were out 'til about midnight. John and I concocted an evil scheme to mess with Sandy. Long story short, she lost a hubcab. She bitched and bitched about it for months. Finally, for Christmas as a joke, I bought the cheapest set of hubcaps from Pep Boys and gave it to her. A few months went by and the hubcaps sat in her living room. Finally, one night I opened the box and went to put them on. I got the first one seated and started bumping it around the edges to snap it in and SNAP! it broke. So I grabbed another and carefully installed it. Except it doesn't match the other hubcaps. Of course she has been bitching and bitching about that. So we decided, we are going to get the cheapest set of spinners we can possibly find and replace one of her OTHER hubcaps with it. Big pimpin baby!! mwhaaahahaaaaa!!!

Anyway, Sandy saw us talking and laughing as she drove off. So on the way home she called. We started chit chatting about the upcoming trip. Now, if you haven't kept up, Sandy has a way of promising to go on a trip right up until the last minute when the BF "suddenly" sends her a plane ticket to some exotic place and she backs out of our trip. She said "BF told me 'I don't want to shoot Mississippi' and I said 'that's good because you weren't invited'" Knowing her pattern I said "WHATEVER!! You know damn good and well you'll get a plane ticket at the last minute and you'll go do that and leave us hanging!" We went round and round about that. I said "I'll even BET you that you back out" She asked "So what do you want?" I said "Baby I want a lot of things but we're talking about the bet". She shot back "I hear you.. WHAT... DO... YOU... WANT?" I said "Oh no... you know you're going to lose.. what are you willing to bet?" We went round in circles with that one for a while. Then she changed the subject and said "Right now I want someone to get these knots out of my feet". I said "I have offered to help you with knots before and you ignored me" She said "Ok.. come get the knots out of my feet" I replied "Ok, I'm heading your way right now". I slowed the truck down. She asked "Where are you?" I said "I'm in my neighborhood turning around". I got "Uh huh". To which I replied "Sweetie, name one time I told you I'd do something and didn't? I'm turning my truck around and heading to you"... silence... then she said "Tommorrow night". I said "Ok.. but remember, I am a man of my word"

Now, who wants to take bets she stammers and finds some reason for me not to come over tonight? Anyone? Anyone?

Another game

Renee inspired this idea.

Again, nothing really new with this little game. Just maybe in the implementation. Here's the idea. It will require a little audience participation. Truth or Dare. This is a work in progress but I'm always up for experimentation.

1) On T&D day I'll pose the question "Truth or Dare?"
2) I will have one of each prepared but not published. E-mail me with your choice. I will reply accordingly. Everybody will get the same truth or dare depending on your choice.
3) Perform said dare or answer said truth. Post proof of the dare or answers on your blog.
4) Leave a comment letting everyone know you have participated and where to read the results.
5) Dares can't involve anything illegal, require 3rd party participation without consent, involve bodily harm, or endangerment.
6) Lastly, with or without consent, no one under 18. If you are under 18 you shouldn't be here anyway (read my content warning), but lets just not involve underage people mm-kay.

Minor details to iron out. The idea behind keeping the questions a secret initially would be that people won't be swayed to choose one over the other. So maybe the best way to do this would be to pose the question on say... Thurs. Answer day should be at least a day later a) to give time for people to respond and b) to make sure people get a chance to participate. Maybe earlier in the week would be better. Say start on Monday and answer Friday. Maybe the "host" could rotate around so that the truths and dares are more diverse (because mine would eventually all be perverted!!)

Any interest? Meh?

TEEMEE One Three Two

It's that time again. TEEEEEeeeee ee ee e EEEMMM eeehm eehm ehm EEEEYEEE.. eyeee..eeye.. eye tttaaaaaaahhhhOOOOOSSSSDAAAAAAYYYYYY AAAY AAY ay ay. Yes it's the game where we ask "Can you cry under water?" and "Why did man walk on the moon before it was discovered that wheels could be put on luggage?"

1. Early bird or night owl?

There's a choice? Hell I'm a parent. Which means I'm an early bird. But I think we all know I'm a night owl at least 1 day of the week.

2. Where was the first place you ever had sex?

Dorm room.

3. On a scale of 1-10, how happy are you? (1 is lowest, 10 is highest)

7

4. Are you more submissive or dominant?

Yup.

5. Do you believe in love at first sight?

Yup. I fall in love all the time! In fact I LOVE the blond walking below my window right now.. C's coaches wife.. DAMN what a fine ass... I even fell in love with each and every one of these lovelies.

Bonus (as in optional): Describe your bed time habits. What side do you sleep on? What do you usual wear? Any night time rituals?

Bed habits?! Hrmm... Generally on the right side (as in my right lying on the bed), butt nekkid. I usually try to read before bed. It relaxes my mind. I often fall asleep holding the book. Sometimes without even finishing the first page. But when I don't have a book, I lie awake for what seems like hours. The ceiling fan has to be on, I need the air flow even if it's just a tiny bit. In the winter I'll set the fan in reverse on the lowest speed.




--------------- Addendum ---------------------

OK... Sorry but I saw this and just HAD to post it. What can I say. Mrs Piggy... Peaches... what more could one ask?

Fat Finger and other stuff

It sounds a lot dirtier than it is. I fat fingered my blackberry the other day and deleted everything from my yahoo account. Sooo.. if you sent me something and I didn't respond, sorry. My bad. Wups.

More news from the company from hell. I just found out one of the founding members has applied for a job here!! YES!! I can't WAIT to rub this in their face at karate!! I can honestly say I am feeling more and more vindicated with every passing day. Is it wrong to take such evil pleasure? This guy is one of the original 5, which means he too is giving up a stake in the company. I SO wanted to take him as well as the guy I brought over from here aside and tell them what went down but I didn't want to chance any kind of repercussion. He's interviewing with my Boss today. I hope I get a chance to say hi.

I got a massage from Bk Friday. Absolutely nothing juicy. At all. In fact, maybe I'm creeping her out a bit. When I was ready to go, she stood away from me. Not even so much as a hug. Hmph.. aight I get it. Professional. She does give a good massage though. I didn't even really talk shit either. Or at least, nothing she didn't serve up for me anyway. Like the comment about having to straddle her dog. I wasn't even going to say anything until she commented first. Even then I think I said "that wasn't exactly the threesome I had in mind". So now I'm a little weirded out about showing up to pool every so often. I was going to go out and buy her a few drinks every once in a while. But now maybe not so much... eh who am I kidding. What else am I going to do on Wed night?

Weekend was pretty boring. Soccer game with C Sat morning followed by a lot of yard work. Worked sun morning and went to the range to practice. Mrs and I did have a nooner after the soccer game. Actually, come to think of it things started off kinda hot. She pushed me on the bed yanking my fav shorts down. She wore a white blouse and a thin flowing skirt. After a few minutes of a really good blow job she hiked her skirt, peeled her panties and climbed on top. This doesn't sound that exotic but it made me think back to the quickies I used to get with Ellen and HF.

Half Assed HNT

Ugh.. I totally forgot about HNT. Here's one I actually took for someone else. Sorry to recycle. I'll do better next week.

Deana

I wonder if it was some kind of revenge. Perhaps a mass spamming to millions of people. Then again it could've been just a typo. Maybe I'm supposed to know her. Or him for that matter. The envelope "to" was only to me so I must assume it was just a typo. At any rate, I received a very cryptic e-mail in my gmail account over the weekend. It simply said "us" and was a picture of a pretty attractive girl (presumably Deana) wrapped in the arms of some guy. I didn't recognize either of them. Nothing really spicy with the pic. The only "shock" value (and I use the term loosely as it doesn't shock me) was that she was white and he was black. Aside from that, both were clothed, his arms were around her. Just a nice picture.

Damnit!

If you're going to send me random pictures of yourself, especially as a complete stranger, make it worth my while!! Show me tits or a good pornographic pose. Perhaps some physiologically impossible position... I'm thinking maybe your legs behind your own head... If this was supposed to be some kind of revenge mass mailing nothing says "Honey I'm having an affair with another man" than a shot of you bent over something impaled by a cock clearly not belonging to your significant other.

I'm just sayin...

TMI Numbah One Three TWO

Yup it's that time again.. TMI Tuesday. Shall we play a game?

1. Pancakes or waffles? With or without toppings?

I have to have a choice?... Hmmm I guess waffles. Toppings. Mmmmmm... waffles...

2. They say, "Way to a man's heart is through his stomach." What is the way to your heart?

Have you not been reading this blog?! No... sigh... my cock of course!!

3. Have you ever gone to a topless/clothing optional beach? If yes, did you participate?

No. But in my head I have and did.

4. What song reminds you of a previous relationship (for good or bad)?

I Hate Everything About You?.. I kid. No really. Yeah not so much. I guess "a" song would be Tall Cool One - Robert Plant because I dated this girl briefly who played that song incessantly. That and we pretty much fucked... non-stop.. Very hot.

5. When, where and with who was your best kiss ever?

I think I may have actually covered this before. I don't even remember her name, though I see her face plain as day. I worked with her in college. My boss was totally smitten with her so we went together as a "safe" date. At the end of the evening she kissed me. It's not often a kiss by itself gives me a little boner but that one was so sexy...

Bonus (as in optional): Does anyone not currently in a relationship with you have pictures or you or your body part(s) that you would prefer that other people not see?

Pictures yes. That would be Taylor. And pretty much the whole blog world. Of anything I would prefer people not to see? Well I wouldn't put them out there now would I if I didn't.


Happy TMI Tuesday

Ahm a Cuntree Boy!

You can take the boy out of the country... eh you know the rest. Had an interesting time up in the hills this weekend. Actually it was kinda busy. We didn't get on the road until 5ish Fri. afternoon. It's about a 4.5 hour trip.

Our first little adventure was at a McDonald's about 1/2 there. I pulled into the parking lot and had something tickling the back of my brain saying "beware". But I couldn't remember specifically why. We went inside to take a potty break and order the food. Everything went ok. We got in the truck and started down the road. Mrs checked the orders carefully handed out the food to C and myself. She started on her fries (this is important in about 20 minutes). As I was driving, she handed me my food 1 item at a time. After she had enough fries (20 minutes after we left the McD's), she decided to dig into her burger. I heard from the other seat "Well GHOT DAMNIT!!!" I looked over to see why Mrs was suddenly cussing. They got her order right. Lettuce, mayonaise, no pickles or onions... They just omitted 1 tiny little detail. The bottom bun. Yup, when you opened the box everything looked just peachy. She peeled back the top bun to make sure they got everything she asked for. It wasn't until she actually tried to pick it up that she noticed nuthin but burger on the bottom. American craftsmanship at it's best.

We got to the mountains around 9:30. There is a sequence of events in gaining access to the land one must go through. First, you have to open the combination lock on the gate and swing it aside. Then you have to stop at the breaker box and turn on the power. Finally, you have to carefully snake your hand into a very scary dark place in the day time and hope nothing is there to bite, sting, or otherwise molest your hand (think Flash Gordon for those geeks old enough to have seen the stump scene). C had fallen asleep long before we made it. She was doing that 1/2 walk 1/2 sleep thing. I opened the door. She and Mrs piled in behind me. I stumbled around looking for light switches. Finally I found one and hit the lights. On the floor lay only what could be described as a bug horror show. Remember, I was the last person up there. I vacuumed and tidied up after myself when I left. If we were about 1" tall we probably would've been screaming at the carnage. There were bug torsos and legs and heads strewn about the floor. The imagery I had in my head was lost on C. I simply got a sleepy "EEwwww".

A quick vacuum and wipe down later and the horror show was but a distant memory. We made the table into the bed C sleeps on. Mrs and I started bringing in all the crap. Finally after about 20 minutes we were "there" enough to relax. I broke out the booze bottles and made a couple of drinks. I wandered out on the porch to sit in the country night air. Mrs spent a few minutes putting her things away. I was amazed at how bright the moon was even behind a thin layer of clouds. You could actually make out the mountains in the distance. Mrs came out wearing her pajamas.

We sat on the porch sipping our drinks listening to the sounds of nature (which at the time consisted of some chiperwhilwallermakealottafuckingnoise bird). Cacaphonous is the only word I can think of.

I went inside to freshen my drink. Mrs was already in her PJs, C was asleep, I thought I may as well get ready myself. Usually I sleep butt naked. But I decided to put on my comfy shorts at least for a few minutes.

I returned to the porch and sat down in my chair. Mrs scooted her chair closer. I let out a little yell when she snaked her hand up my shorts leg. The temperature had dropped significantly and her hand was fucking FROZEN!! In spite of the initial retreat, my cock responded appropriately. She teased and played with it almost lazily at first. A slight breeze picked up, just enough to make me start to shiver. Mrs leaned over pulling my shorts lower letting my cock spring free. My body was covered with goose bumps from the temperatures. She got out of her chair sliding her PJ bottoms off as she moved towards me. I stood up to meet her. I grabbed her hips and spun her towards the porch railing. She quickly bent over the rail. I slid up behind her letting my cock slide along her slit. She squealed when my frozen cock met her warm moist pussy. Quickly I slid my cock. The heat was intense. She squealed more. We tried to fuck slowly with her bent over the rail. But the angle was awkward and things just.. didn't want to cooperate. She pushed me back and grabbed one of the porch chairs. She climbed onto the seat on her knees resting her hands on the seat back. I positioned myself behind her and slid my cock home again. This was much better. The sensations were bizzarre. I was shivering. Mrs felt was very cool to the touch. My cock was alternately cool in the breeze and enveloped in heat as I slid deep in her pussy. I hate to say it, but I was grateful to finally cum. The breeze had picked up significantly by the time we finished and I was really... really fucking cold!

I made the mistake of telling my Mom we were coming to the mountains. My Mom and stepfather only live about 1.5 hours away. Usually that's plenty of distance when we need our alone time. However, they have decided to jump into a business venture together and they are looking to locate.. you guessed.. in the mountains. Now, I love my Mom. But they have a knack of driving me insane. Mrs phrased it best when she called them time "monopolizers". First they wanted us to go to dinner, then they wanted us to come see their business, then they wanted to do lunch. Meanwhile, my Dad asked me to do a little maintenance chore on the camper. As I am using it for free I feel it's only fair I do as he asks. Especially since it should only take an hour or two (snark... yeah right). So when I got up Saturday I was facing dwindling "us" time. I jumped on the repair my Dad needed first thing.

The water pump had cracked during one of the winter freezes. We don't really need it since we are on well water. Water comes from the well pump. But the water does flow through or around the pump somehow. You can work around it by simply turning the well on and off only when you need it. But think running outside every time you have to flush the toilet or wash your hands or need to fill something. I bought a pump and brought it with me. Yes it was the right size etc. I gathered my tools and started working. Should've been easy enough. Loosen these fittings. Swap the pump. Tighten them back up. Except I was loosening the first fitting and SNAP! the fucker broke in half. Shit!!

So I treked down the mountain to the closest RV store and purchased a replacement. Back up the mountain. New fitting went on just fine. Only 2 more to go. I got the next fitting on no probs. The final fitting was almost finished. Just need to give a little snug and SNAP!! Broke THAT one. FUCK!!

I hopped back in the truck and trekked BACK down the mountain to the RV store again. A half hour later and the guy couldn't find the part. Another dude came over and said "Ok, we'll just have to do it differently. Use this" and he handed me a part that does the same thing only in a slightly different way. I asked what time they closed just in case I broke something else. They closed in 10 minutes.

Back up the mountain I went. Hopped out of the truck and ran to the pump. FUCK!! The part wouldn't fit. So now, we didn't have water AT ALL. I went from a tiny pinhole drip to no fucking water. The part I needed was really a plastic nut that slipped over a fitting and compressed the hoses together. They wouldn't just sell the nut. I looked at the part he gave me and the one I broke. I decided I could cut the new one in half and get the nut off. I grabbed whatever tools I could find and hacked away. Because I couldn't really hold it still it took me a good 30 minutes just to cut it off. The nut was too small to fit over the fitting. But only a tiny bit. I needed to open up the nut just a hair. Unfortunately, I didn't really have anything to cut or drill it with. I dug around the place and found a rasp you use to rough up a puncture on a tire before you plug it.

An hour later I finally had rasped and rasped enough so it would make it over the fitting and bada bing bada boom... we were in business.

My Mom called several times in the middle of it all. They wanted to go to a town about an hour away for dinner. It was driving me insane. I just wanted to have a quiet weekend. I put them off and compromised until the plan was they would come up to the camp. Have a few drinks. We would meet my grandfather (oh yeah she got him involved somewhere along the line) at a restaurant only about 30 minutes away. I spent a few hours with C riding the 4 wheeler around. Then it was time to get ready. Mrs and C took a quick shower. I took mine while Mrs was getting C dressed. I don't know why, but C just LOVES to watch movies in different places (personally I'd rather get out and enjoy the place). Mrs popped a movie in for C. I grabbed a drink and my comfy shorts and went outside. Once the movie got going Mrs came out and joined me. The day started all rainy and overcast. But by late afternoon, the sun was out and it was nice and warm. I heard the door close behind me. Without fanfaire, I stripped off my shorts and marched up the road to the barn butt naked leaving Mrs giggling behind me. I heard the door slam twice. I looked over my shoulder to see Mrs taking pictures. I'll have to try to sneak them off her camera. I was worried my Mom might show up any minute so I only walked around naked for just a few minutes.

6:00 rolled around and no Mom. Perfect. Not only were they taking over the weekend, but they were late to boot. I fixed myself a drink and said "fuck it" I'm going to kick back and enjoy myself. Finally, 30 minutes later, they showed up. We probably should've left for the restaurant, but C was dying to give them a tour and they made US wait, so they could put up with her tour. It didn't last long. My Grandfather called. He was hungry damnit.. let's hurry up.

The evening actually turned out kinda nice. Got to see my Grandfather. He's looking well but he's starting to confuse simple things. Like my Mom for my sister etc. I know he's old and all but he has been as sharp as a tack until now. It was an eye opener.

We ended up stopping by his house for just a little bit. It was way past C's bedtime. Finally we said our goodbyes and tried to leave. My Mom chimed in again. Now she wanted us to come by and visit their business in the morning AND go to brunch. I wanted to shake her and go "MOM.. I LOVE YOU BUT YOU'RE DRIVING ME INSANE!!! WE'LL COME BACK AND DO ALL OF THIS ANOTHER TIME I PROMISE!!!" She laid a big guilt trip on me as we left.

Sunday I woke up thinking of how to get out of doing the whole day thing with my Mom. We got up, had breakfast, cleaned up a little. C wanted to take the 4 wheeler out. I rode her around a little bit. Mrs wanted me to show her how to ride it. I gave her a quick lesson and sent her off. She picked it up pretty quickly (but seriously, there's no clutch so how hard can it be?). My step-father called. We basically told him we were trying to get our stuff together and IF we got ready in time we could meet them. I guess they didn't realize we were leaving Sunday. A few minutes later they called back and said so and also said they had finished everything they needed to do and were heading back to their home. Whew!

We finally got to relax and play around. I got out a few guns and popped a few rounds (cause that's what you do in the cuntree). Mrs and C played with the 4 wheeler some. We ate a liesurely lunch.

After lunch, C suddenly said she was really tired and wanted to lay down. We checked her temperature to make sure she wasn't sick and put her to bed. She fell asleep almost immediately. I grabbed a beer and headed outside. Mrs came out shortly after. I was standing by my truck when she walked up. She snaked her arm around my waist then snuggled up close pressing her face to my neck. I put my arms around her. She slid her hands to my ass. To my surprise, my cock jumped to life. I guess it was obvious to Mrs (being pressed against her stomach and all). She pushed me backwards until I was sitting on the edge of the porch. Quickly she grabbed my belt buckle and pulled my pants down. Her mouth went to my cock. After a few minutes I pulled her up and slid my hand into her pants. She was soaked already. My finger quickly slid into her pussy. She came almost immediately soaking my hand. I slid my finger to her clit. She shook, her knees buckled. An idea sprung in my head. My Dad built a metal building we call the barn. He parked his tractors and a few other pieces of equipment he wanted to leave inside. I remembered seeing an old vinyl camping mattress he used to keep in his truck for whenever he took long trips. It was leaning against a wall. I pulled my pants up just enough so I could walk and lead Mrs up the road towards the barn. She did the same.

Usually, we open the barn and leaving all the doors open when we're there. But I had closed it up thinking we would leave after C woke up. I unlocked the side door and we slipped in. The mattresses were in a corner against the back wall. We threw them on the floor next to the bobcat. I seemed kinda cool to be in there naked with all that machinery. Mrs pulled me down onto the mattress with her. She was still soaked. My cock slid home without any hesitation. She cried out giggling at the echoes of her voice bouncing off of the metal walls. Her finger went to her clit rubbing it furiously while I pumped away. She brought her knees up and began to shake as her orgasm washed over her. I wasn't far behind sending my load deep into her pussy. I felt as if I would cum for hours.

Giggling, we put the mattress back and ran back down the road to the camper to check on C. Not much really after that. We packed and loaded up the truck. Eventually we had to wake C so we could hit the road.

I think the next time I go up, I'm going to have to ride the 4 wheeler on some of the trails naked. I just have to watch out for the wait-a-minute vines. Ouch!!

Memememe Falalala

Mrs finished her spring work hell last week. To celebrate we are heading to the mountains. It will be a quick weekend. I'm not going to take any time off so we're heading up after work today and coming back sunday afternoon/evening. Hopefully at some point Mrs and I will be having a lot of outdoor sex. Maybe this time we'll remember bug spray.

Amorous Rocker tagged me with this little meme. Rules are simple:

1. Answer the questions
2. Tag 5 people.

And awaaaaaaaay we go:

What I was doing 10 years ago?:

I dunno... what were you doing 10 years ago? Oh... you mean me? 10 years ago I was fucking Ellen. Glad I got that out of my system.


Five things on my to-do list today:

1. Answer meme
2. Pack for mountains
3. Masturbate
4. Have sex
5. When I'm turned down for 3 and 4 (sucks when I turn myself down) drink


Five Snacks I enjoy:

1. Cheese Puffs
2. Popcorn
3. Those big chewy pretzels
4. Ice cream
5. Pussy

Five Things I would do if I were a billionaire:

1. Spend a month at the Bunny Ranch
2. Buy the company from hell just to fire the President
3. Pay someone to tie my shoes
4. Sleep late
5. Buy a plane and fly around the country to visit my favorite bloggers


Five of my bad habits:

1. Blogging - spend way too much time at work doing this
2. Believing what people say
3. Spending money I don't have
4. Cussing
5. Picking my nose, butt, scratching, adjusting (guys you know what I mean), biting my fingernails... well some of them anyway.

Five places I have lived:

Well.. at least 2 of them are pretty specific and I haven't lived that many places. I don't think moving from burb to burb in a metro area counts so..

1. Upstate SC
2. Charlotte NC area
3. Delray Beach Fl
4. Lower SC

Five jobs I’ve had:

1. Grocery bagger
2. Cook at McDonalds
3. Ditch digger and general construction laborer
4. Geek Teacher
5. Geek - professional that is

What I’d like to be doing in 25 years:

Sitting on my ass. Preferably with a 21ish yr old gold digging sex starved nympho on my lap with that billion from question #4.

I suck at tagging so if you feel inclined to answer... please go ahead and do so. If you do, just drop a note in the comments and I'll maybe edit this post with links.

Rock Lobster HNT

It wasn't a Rock... it was a ROCK... LOBSTER!!

While working thursday I took my shirt off for a little sun. One of the wimens helping came over and started slathering me with sunscreen. She only got my shoulders. Can you tell?

Wanking Wed. - Hotel Love

I was pretty tired. I had every intention of having some hot, steamy, hotel sex but... well as we know how things go with me.. not so much. But.. there I was nonetheless in bed, naked, semi-aroused. My hand found it's way to my cock (normal position anyway).

I felt her breath on my skin. Her hair brushed across my thighs. She teased me by running her hands across thighs, stomach, hip. So close to my cock but.. not.. quite. My cock swelled at each pass. Finally, her hand wrapped around the shaft. It throbbed with anticipation. Slowly she slid her hand up the shaft to the tip. She slid her palm around spreading the precum sending shivers through my body. Her hand slid back down the shaft to the base of my cock. It strained against her hand impossibly hard.

Slowly she slid back up to the tip twisting at the top, each time sending a shiver through my body. Her fingers were quickly covered in my precum. She started a slow rhythm, slide, little twist at the top. Her other hand teased my balls. I could feel the tension build. I quickly felt the orgasm start at the base of my cock. She sensed it too and stopped whispering "not yet".

I tried to pull her to me to give her a proper fucking but she held back saying "not yet". Her hand went back to my cock just holding it. Again, slowly up and down. My cock was now slick from the pre-cum oozing from the tip. She had me on the edge of cumming. Speeding up until I was about to burst then slowing down drawing it out. My cock was screaming for release.

Without warning, she stopped letting my cock fall against my stomach. Slowly she slipped her bra off of her shoulders. I had only been able to imagine what her breasts would look like in person. Pictures simply don't do them justice. She hooked her thumbs in her panties and slid them down her thighs. She said "I want you to be still" as she crawled onto the bed.

Starting with my thigh she ran her tongue up my leg almost to my balls. My cock was throbbing almost jumping on it's own. She let her hair drape across my stomach dragging it as she lowered her mouth to my other leg. Teasingly, she slid her tongue along my leg again. She did this several times until I was just about ready to take over. Her tongue when to my balls stopping me. She ran her tongue up from my balls to the underside of my shaft finally teasing the tip for just a second.

She slid her body along mine until my cock was nestled between her beautiful tits. Slowly she slid her body up and down fucking my cock with her tits. I was reaching the point of no return, I could feel it throb in the base of my cock. The sensation was overwhelming me when she slid away leaving me hanging on the verge yet again. I grabbed her arms again attempting to push her on her back to give her a good fucking. Again she denied me simply whispering "not yet". Frustrated, I grumbled to the darkness.

She slid her body along mine. I could feel her tits along my thighs, wrapping around my cock, pressing against my stomach and chest. I could feel the warmth of her pussy sliding along my cock. She shivered as she used her body to slide my cock along her slit.

Sitting up, she grabbed my cock and slid down on it until I was completely inside. Slowly, she slid herself up and down just as she had earlier with her hands and her tits. My cock begged to go faster. I grabbed her hips trying to quicken the pace. She batted them away saying "patience". She rocked herself on my cock milking every nerve ending as she slid up and down. I was so close to cumming and yet she knew exactly how to hold me off. I could feel an ache build deep in my balls.

Finally, she allowed me to flip her on her back. I had been holding off for so long I thought I was cum right away. Instead my cock was rock hard. The ache had almost dulled my senses just enough to keep my on the edge and yet still in control of the orgasm just lingering a breath away. I started slow with every intention of teasing her as she had me. Sliding my cock almost to the point of slipping out, then driving slowly until I was completely buried. But she knew she had completely control over me. She grabbed my hips and urged me faster. I tried to hold off but my cock had other ideas. I drove faster and harder. To my surprise my cock felt even harder if possible than before. My orgasm was inching it's way closer and closer. I couldn't believe after all the times I was about to explode now it was taking it's sweet time. The sensation was both luxuriant and maddening at the same time.

I felt her pussy tighten around my cock as she started to cum. Finally I felt the familiar sensation of my own orgasm building beyond control. My whole body contracted as it finally burst from deep within my balls. My cock couldn't get enough driving into her pussy again and again as I seemed to cum forever. I realized all of the muscles in my body had gone rigid and were now shaking. I finally collapsed in a heap.

Such was how it played out in my head. Sadly I had only my imagination to play with all alone in my little hotel room. Whoa was me.. :)

Tooosdee of TMI

Play that crazy boogaloo known as TMI Tuesday

1. Did you have to pay or did you get money back?

You can get your money back? Can I trade up? Wait... what are we talking about? Oh.... yes and no. No to feds (but only a few $$) and yes to State.

2. What was your biggest financial mistake?

Getting married... twice... Hell the list is long. If you want to be a millionaire don't do what I do. Pretty much every stock purchase. There was the time I had about 5k in company stock. They sold our contract so I got rid of the stock at $24. It went to $120 and split, then to $80 and split, then over $100 and split. Could've owned my house outright.


3. Are you a screamer?

I'm screaming right now. See #2. That's not what you meant? No I'm not much of a noise maker at all. I'm weird that way. I guess it's a holdover from being quiet so the parents wouldn't hear.


4. What part of your body, other than your genitals, do you love to have touched? What part of a partner's body, other than their genitals, do you love to touch?

On me I guess my back. Someone else? Other than genitals? Anything I can get my hands on!! I'm all about touch.


5. What [edit: 12:30] commercial catch phrase best describes your life?

"Nausea. Heartburn. Indigestion. Upset stomach. Diareah" Haha!!

Bonus (as in optional): What was the last thing you took without permission? What was the last thing taken from you without your permission?

Uhh.... let's not incriminate oneself mmkay... Geez I can't remember the last time I took something without permission. I guess Mrs' camera. I don't think anyone has ever taken anything from me without permission since I was a kid. Dude stole a present from under our tree when I was a kid.

First PLACE!!! First PLACE!!!

DQ that is... as in disqualified!!

Everything started off great. Then I had a little equipment malfunction. My hand went to draw and there was nothing there but air. Wups. I was pretty pissed at the time but shit happens. I won't dwell.

The rest of the weekend was a blur. Friday night I went to a party. Chester had to go to some family thing. The other gang went to dinner with family leaving just Sandy and me to go to the party. She came by the room on the way from the range and I fixed her a drink. She came to pick me up too. I fixed her another. I suppose that was my opportunity. I dunno... I just let the moment go by. I didn't really pick up on vibes. The party was a blast. There are quite a few characters in this bunch and it makes for an entertaining time.

Saturday I worked all day. Friday was the staff's time to shoot. Saturday was for everyone else. Somewhere in early afternoon it started pouring. Fortunately it only lasted about a 1/2 hour. After it was all over we had about an hour to get back to the hotel, shower, get to dinner, then go to the awards banquet. I had about 5 minutes to shower. Then I hauled ass to where Sandy was staying and picked her up.

After the banquet we went to the "after" party. Nothing really juicy. Those guys are complete nutcases though, then add alcohol. I don't think I've laughed that hard in a long time. I didn't plan to make it a late night. Around 11 I looked over and Sandy looked like she was about to fall over. I felt the same way. We promised to give one of the head honchos a ride back to his house (his wife had to leave early). We tried to make our exit but a) he was blowing off MAJOR steam and b) he LOOOVES to talk. Finally, around 1am (yeah.. 2 hours later) we left. I was completely exhausted.

We tore down everything Sunday and went back to our home range to drop all of the stuff off. Sandy asked if I wanted to go to lunch but I had a trailer attached to my truck and I really wanted to get rid of it. We said we'd get together later. Well.. I got home... fell asleep. SHE got home and fell asleep to and so much for that.

And that was my weekend! I wished I could've had some awesome mischief to report. Maybe some hotel sex. Titty bar. Sadly I was pretty boring. Well.. I did have some hotel self-love Thursday night... but... that can hardly count!

Sorry I've been slack on my commenting but my only mobile computing is now my crackberry. But I'm sure my comments would have all been insightful and witty so go ahead and chuckle!

HNT - This Ride

is open for business!! HAHA!! Today's HNT is a quick and dirty crop... Headin' outta town to play my redneck games. Have a very Happy HNT!!





















06...

Attention W@l-M@rt Shoppers

GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY!!!! (this is a rant if you haven't picked up on that yet)

Yes the evil corporate giant that is Wally World opened a store right across from the entrance to my subdivision. We used to be out in the boonies all by ourselves. Of course in the short time I've lived in my neighborhood urban sprawl has reached us (though one could argue we ourselves are in fact sprawl).

Our neighborhood is at the end of what is supposed to be a major conduit to the next town about 15 miles away. However, lack of funding has it ending at about 4 miles. County ordinance etc. has dictated only X number of entrances to the road/mile and use frontage roads along it. Supposedly this to keep traffic flowing unencumbered by numerous red lights. The speed limit is a decent 55. It is 4 lanes with a huge median. By all rights, it should be a very fast road to travel in my commute.

Wally World used to have a store at the beginning of this road near the intersection of the perimeter sub-highway running around my city. They decided to build a SUPER Wally Mart and put it at the end of the road instead of at the perimeter. Because the main road abruptly ends, you must either turn right or left. My neighborhood and Wally world are to the left. Can you guess where I'm going with this. All those F@#$ing Wally World shoppers, because EVENTUALLY, they must turn left, all do 45 in the LEFT HAND F@#$ING LANE for 4 F@#$ING MILES!!

Lemme esplain how this mysterious road thing works. 2 lanes... the travel lane is on the right.. the PASSING lane is on the left. IF YOU ARE NOT FUCKING PASSING!!! GET THE HELL OVER!! Sure I can understand getting in the left hand lane for the last 1/2 mile to mile. But let the rest of us go home in the previous 3 miles DAMNIT!!

They all have the same clueless blank stare too. As if their little world is the only one in existence. I'm sure they are perfectly ok with standing in the only open checkout lane (even though there are 24) for 45 minutes while the person in front of them chats with the cashier about their sister and cousin and weather (because they will too) and THEN decides they don't have enough money so they start checking the price of EACH and EVERY item then debate whether or not to buy it.. THEN they use a personal check which requires a manager to come from the break room in the BACK OF THE FUCKING STORE!!

Never in my life have I prayed... nay BEGGED for a miracle of corporate disaster to rid me of the abomination as I do for the demise of Wally World. I, Mr. leave the damned olympics alone what have the athletes done to deserve the disrespect of some selfish rich kids who need an excuse to take Daddy's 12 mpg SUV on a cross country roadtrip with their little boyfriends, [taking breath] want to protest the fact they inconvenience me horribly and are causing a blight on not only my environment, but hinder my in and egress from my own little private space. Forget evil corporate practices. Forget retail evangelicism. Forget the empty store they left (and promised to rehabilitate) sitting for vagrants and ferile cats. I want to pick up a sign and march out front just because they bug me!

[breathing... breathing...] I'm done.

Heading out of town tomorrow. I have TONS of stuff to do today. I do have an HNT for tomorrow if I remember to post it. I'm seriously behind on my commenting. Sorry. Hopefully next week I'll be back to a somewhat more normal pace.

Have a good weekend!

Too Much

MUUUUUCH too much. It's TMI Tuesday time!!

1. Your boyfriend/girlfriend cheats on you with your best friend, who are you (more) mad at?

As I usually don't have a lot of "men" friends, I'd have to say my girlfriend/wife. But then again... my friends tend to be women so... it would just be hard to be pissed at all.

2. Is there something someone could say to you that would cross a boundary of not being able to take back or forgive them?

Yes.

Oh I'm supposed to answer that? Now why oh why would I give anyone ammo?

3. What non-sexual body part do you find the sexiest?

Heh.. I read this wrong at first. Eyes. Smile. Definitely.

4. Would you ever consider cosmetic surgery to have the perfect body?

Uhh... no. I don't think I could possibly have enough money. Time. Blood.

5. Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex?

Yes. But there's a story there. My buddy, Chris from the camping story, came to visit one weekend while I was still in college (he had been long since sent home at that point). We were drinking and he was making an ass of himself. My roomate had his wisdom teeth taken out a day or two before and his whole family was there hanging out too. Chris decided he wanted to arm wrestle me (there was alcohol involved). At the time, Chris outweighed me by about a hundred pounds. But as I'm a sneaky bastard... I said ok. We locked arms on the coffee table. He counted 1... 2.. THREE!! I reached across with my other hand, grabbed him by the head and planted one. His eyes were about as big as saucers... then I slammed his hand down. I rule! Roomate's family couldn't stop laughing for a good 20 minutes.

Bonus (as in optional): If you were going to have a one night stand, who would you rather it be with- an ex or someone totally random you just met.

How 'bout someone random AND an ex? No? Sigh.. well as I've already been with the ex... and I'm all about the strange... though there is something to be said for the whole grudge angle.. but then again it would be weird... but it IS sex after all and who would I be to argue... Clear on that?

Something Resembling Normalcy

Meh..

This week is going to be somewhat quiet around pluffland. Our big match is this weekend. This is the one where the local gang actually sets up some stuff. We're taking tons of equipment and props (think mobile theater with sets and everything... kinda like that) out of town. I have so much stuff to do between now and Thursday morning. Wed. night will probably be a bust because I have to be at the range at 8am Thurs morning to load up. However, if any loverlies out in pluffland would like to join me at my hotel... I supposed I could find some time... =D

Nothing else exciting in pluffland. Shot a match Sat. It was kind of my last "practice" before the big one. Saturday night Sandy invited me to a party. Oooh... wait.. let me back up. I pretty much ignored her all week. She called several times. Left me a couple of "Call me" messages. I didn't. So finally Fri she called and I answered. She sounded a little miffed that I was ignoring her. I just claimed to be swamped. Then she invited me to a party. I'd like to say I told her to piss off that after lying and blowing me off the previous weekend she could find some other sucker to feed into her ego... but who are we talking about. I went. Nothing exciting. A lot of lawyer types. Got pretty smashed. Took her home. Went home myself and passed out.

And that's pretty much all there is. Almost boring.

NananaanaNnooonononononoooooner

I walked in the house surprising everyone. Though, with C it was less than enthusiastic. Eye's glued to the TV I got the, I'm turning my head your way to say high but my eyes are still on the TV deal. Mrs was just a little bit more enthusiastic. She actually made eye contact.

I had a lot of things to get done. My truck was horribly filthy. So was my gun. I hadn't packed my gunbag. I think I still even had ammo to make. Gas up.. the list was long. It was absolutely beautiful outside. About 78, slight breeze. Sunny. I decided to tackle my truck first. I went to the bedroom to change out of my work clothes. As my pale pasty belly hadn't seen daylight in several months, I just threw on a pair of shorts.

Mrs was in the kitchen cleaning. I walked by on the way to the garage. As I started to pass by, mischief got the better of me. I veered off course and eased up behind her pressing my body into hers. Before she could react, I let my teeth scrape lightly on her neck just below her ear. One hand slid up her shirt grasping her nipple through her bra. My other hand snaked down the front of her pants and into her panties. Her knees buckled just a little from the sudden onslaught. As quickly as I started, I broke away and walked into the garage hearing a whimper from behind me. I can be an evil bastard sometimes.

I don't remember what I went into the garage for, but I know I didn't find it so I had to walk back through the kitchen again. Again, I veered off course. Again, I assaulted Mrs. Again, I quickly broke away. Again.. whimper.

Because I'm clearly getting senile in my new decade, I suddenly remembered where I put whatever I was looking for before. In the garage. I took yet another little trip through the kitchen. Veered again. Assaulted again. Started to pull away again (and yes I would've done this to her all afternoon if she'd let me and I had the patience to tease). This time her hands clamped down on my arms. I pulled her close and slipped my finger into her pussy pressing my stiffening cock against her ass. This time she pulled away. She still held my arms and pulled me with her. We kinda shuffle stepped towards the bedroom. As we neared the door, she let go of me and pushed her pants down around her ankles. I closed and locked the door behind me (we're finally learning). Mrs threw her clothes off and sat on the bed. As I approached the bed, Mrs was scooting herself backwards. I grabbed her thighs spreading them. Without wasting time I assaulted her pussy with my mouth. She started quivering almost immediately. I was relentless with my tongue. No teasing.. no slow build up. I went straight for her clit. My face was instantly covered with her juice and she came fast and hard. I slid my hand under her ass pressing her to my mouth. She tried to squirm away but I held fast. She tried to clamp her thighs shut but I shifted my shoulders blocking her move. She managed to get her heels on my hip and with her feet and hands shoved me away. I sat up and grasped her knees yanking her to me so that I was between her legs. I lowered my mouth to her nipple. She cried out still sensitive from her orgasm and alternately pushed me away and pulled me back to her nipple wanting more but finding the sensation almost too much. After a few seconds her arms collapsed and I sucked her nipple into my mouth. I was very careful to keep distance between our bodies so that my only touch was my mouth. She began to strain her hips forward trying to press her pussy against my body. I pulled away more denying her while still attacking her breasts.

After a few minutes of this I quickly slid down her body. My hands went to her ass pulling her to my mouth. Again I assaulted her clit. She cried out and began to shake again. Almost immediately she was on the verge of another orgasm. She tried to squirm backwards, I held her ass and followed her until her head was hanging off the edge of the bed. She came again. I sat up and pulled her towards me and started teasing her nipples. She shivered and pushed me away with every touch of my tongue, she was still too sensitive after her 2nd orgasm. Eventually she relaxed and I played with her extremely hard nipples.

Again I slid my body down until my tongue was teasing her clit. Her body shook as I flicked my tongue back and forth, up and down until she was on the verge of yet another orgasm. This time I stopped. My tongue rested against her clit but I didn't move. Slowly, I slid down her slit and into her pussy. She wrapped her legs around my shoulders urging me deeper. I fucked her with my tongue. Slowly I could feel her start to relax. Her legs collapsed open, her pussy in front of me as if on a plate. She no longer had the energy to push me away. I ran my tongue up to her clit and back deep into her pussy. Back and forth. Each time I reached her clit I could feel her body tense and quiver, then relaxas I slid my tongue back to her pussy. I moved my tongue faster. Her hands slid to my head holding it on her clit. My tongue flicked her clit faster and faster. She pulled my head grinding my tongue against it. Her legs tensed around my shoulders. Her breath exploded from her mouth, juice soaking my face as she came again while trying to squirm away. I pulled her to my mouth. She put her foot on my shoulder and shoved me off of her pussy.

I still had my shorts on. She sat up attacking the button. I slid back off the bed and let them slide to the floor. She scooted herself with me until her ass was perched on the edge of the bed. She threw one leg over my shoulder and with the other around my waist, pulled me to her. My cock slid inside. We didn't waste any time. She used her leg to pull me inside almost as if she were spurring me (thank God we don't own any). She covered her face to muffle a cry. I could see goose pimples along her arm. Her nipples stood tall. I was almost having an out of body experience. I watched myself fuck through a camera lens where my eyes should have been. Mrs squeezed her eyes, her hands gripped the sheets, her hips moved on their own bucking against my cock. Her hand slid to her clit. I don't know when she decided to finger herself while we're fucking. This is a new trick of hers. But I like it. Watching her cum is such an incredible turn on for me. It sends me over the edge almost every time. This time was no different. Her body froze. It looked as if she were doing a crunch. Her thighs squeezed around me. It was as if her body was focusing all of it's energy on the sensation coming from her pussy each muscle and nerve straining to milk every bit of the orgasm that suddenly washed over her.

From my camera eye, it was intense. I came and came. My body reacted involuntarily thrusting deep as my load filled her. I could feel her pussy pulsing against my cock as aftershocks coursed through her body. I realized I was a ball of tensed muscles, each reliving over and over the tingling sensation flowing through my own body. I was still standing beside the bed, if you call quivering and shaking "standing".

I don't know why, but I LOVE the sensation of pulling my semi-rigid cock from Mrs when I know she's been well fucked. Something about the act is almost as erotic as when I slide inside in the beginning. Almost as if it is the exclamation to the sentence.

I quickly put my shorts back on, gave Mrs a kiss, and washed my truck.

=====================================================

I almost didn't have the energy to write about the nooner for a variety of reasons. First, I saw Bad Kitty yesterday afternoon for a massage. Nothing juicy happened. Just a really nice massage. I don't think I can afford to do it often, but I plan to do it again... as often as money will allow. I did get a little tongue action though. It was wholly unexpected and I actually jumped off the table. I know... not the action you would expect or hope from me. However, let me 'esplain. I was laying face down on the table while she massaged my calf when SLURP!!! Right on the mouth through the hole where you put your face. Her dog snuck up and licked me right on the mouth. I was damned near asleep when she did it. BK never even saw her sneaking up. I'm not sure who startled who more, me from the lick, BK from me suddenly exploding off my stomach, or the dog from BK's WAAAH!! when I jumped up. Needless to say, I was tense for just a couple of moments after that. Well... and BK kept threatening to bust out a toy on me while I was lying in a very compromised position. I told her at that particular moment, I probably wouldn't have cared. Well.. unless the toy sounded like a chain saw. I'd probably tense just a little...

It was probably a big mistake, but I went to karate after the massage. I'm guessing I undid everything BK accomplished. Or rather I'm feeling it in my lower back today. Don't know if it is after effects from the massage or the workout.

I got home around 9ish. I had one of those "I'm a horrible Dad moments" when I went up to check on C and kiss her goodnight and she wasn't there. It was one of those "Do you know where your children are" moments and sadly, I didn't. Turns out C's school is out for Teacher's workday today. C was spending the night at the MIL's house.

I changed out of my gi and threw on my fav shorts (see HNT a couple of weeks ago for reference). Mrs whipped up a quick dinner. I settled onto the couch to watch the Lost rerun. I've already watched them all, but I LOVE the little pop-up explanations. Mrs grabbed my legs, spread them, and settled down with her head on my lap. I thought "Oh yeah.. C's gone, I'm in my easy access shorts mostly nekid". Within seconds I hear "zzzzzzz". Pissed me off. I said "Go to bed". I got "hmph.. NO". A few more minutes of "zzzz". Push push. "GO TO BED"... her "No I LIKE it here". I was thinking "If all you're going to do is sleep, I have better things *I* could do". Finally, I just got up. She didn't even wake up when I got up. I mean, I have to move her head to get up right? She just raised up enough for me to slide out then thunk! passed out on the couch.

This morning I got out of the shower right as she was walking in the bathroom. My cock was in an impressive state at the moment (I did a little goofy "the many faces of my cock" pictoral post a long time ago). Not stiff or anything, but definitely chest thumping mode. I grabbed my towel and started to dry off. Mrs sidled up to me and slid her hand to my cock give it a little stroke. I said "Oh noo... you fell asleep last night. The moment's gone!" She stomped her foot and said "DAMNIT I KNEW you we're gonna say that!! COME ON!!" and walked to the bed. She hiked her nightie up and sat back on the bed on her elbows giving me the full on spread leg beaver shot... "Well COME ON!!" I said "Meh" and walked around to the other side of the bed to put my clothes on. She scooted her body around and re-assumed the position, legs spread, pussy thrust towards me. I said "I'm gonna be late to work" and pulled my jeans on. She walked away pouting.

I know, I'm an evil bastard. But seriously, the falling asleep routine is getting old. Which is the biggest reason I just wasn't feeling it to write about the nooner. Anyway, I guess I'll give her a good one later if she's awake long enough for it.

Lastly, be sure to check out the Free ASS Friday post below. I'm totally curious to see how long we can go with this.

Free Ass. Friday

Free..... ASS... yeah baby.. FREE ASS FRIDAY!!

Thought this would be fun to see what us pervs would come up with. The rules are simple. I will post a word or phrase below. It can be anything. A saying, an object, person, whatever. The first commenter will take it and free associate their response. Then next person will look at the last comment, and free associate on it. So on and so on. We'll see where this takes us. It'll either be hillarious or a flop. Or a hillarious flop.

Anyhoo... Let's get on with it. Today's Free ASS is:

Tiger Balm

Ok tuolk amongst yahsielves (ok poor Mike Myers impersonation)

HNT - Shuffle

I was telling a fellow blogger about the match I shot this past weekend. It was raining and cold. After an hour or so, the rain stopped, but it left most of the place a red mud bog. One of the stages required a fair amount of running. Or rather, would've if it weren't slicker than goose shit on glass with the damned mud. You ended up doing the "old man shuffle" just so you wouldn't bust your ass. She giggled at the thought of the shuffle and today's HNT was thusly inspired.

I shot a video of the shuffle. Today's HNT is me in old man shuffle step!

Welcome to the Realm of Dorkenshire

Sometimes I have it completely scripted in my head. She is standing in a room. We have already spent a few nervous moments with preliminaries... kissing.. teasing... getting to know one another in quiet touches. Our clothes seemingly disappeared one piece at a time until we are finally naked, stripped of preconceptions and raw to each others eyes. She is facing away from me. I move closer feeling the warmth of our bodies mingle in the shrinking space between us. I have imagined the sensation of my hand sliding along the curves of her body. My mouth goes to her neck as our bodies finally press together in a rush of sensations. My brain strains to process it all. How does her body feel against mine? How does she smell? Taste? Goose pimples rise along her arms. My hand rests on her waist; the curve of her body no longer a simple image. Her head falls back allowing my mouth to roam along her neck and shoulders. My arms wrap around her pulling her closer. There is no denying my arousal as my cock presses against her ass.

We move to the bed in synchronous motion. She slides down to her stomach letting one knee cock to the side. My body slides along side. My mouth finds the nape of her neck while my fingers drift along her back. With a light touch the trace her spine sliding over to her waist following the line of her hip to the outside of her thigh. Her body reacts on it's own. Her ass rises to meet my hand. My fingers slip from her thigh across her buttocks. She presses against me whimpering for my fingers to explore more.... etc. etc. etc.

Bleh.. Enough with the fantasies... I'm SO ready to get on with the nekkidness for real!!

Thurs last week I ended up working half the night. We had a system crash right as I got home from work. While I could work on recovering from home, I spent almost every possible minute on the problem until well after 1am. So Friday I decided to leave around noon. I thought to myself "Hmmm... what kind of mischief could I possibly get into?" Then I remembered Bad Kitty. She gave me her number Wed night. I thought, at a minimum, maybe I could get a massage. So I did it. I called. Unfortunately, I got her answering machine. I knew she was having problems with her cell phone. The message I got was one of those computer generated "XXX-YYY-ZZZZ is not available, Please leave a message at the tone" deals. I went ahead and left a message. But I figured I wouldn't hear back.

I drove home seeing mischief slip away. It worked out ok. Mrs was home with C for spring break and I had a pretty hot nooner. I didn't hear back from Bad Kitty.

Monday I was walking to my truck after work expecting a call from my Dad. My phone rang. To my surprise it was a female, Bad Kitty. She actually caught me off guard because I had written the call off. I stammered something about calling to see when she would be available then fumbled with my schedule. We ended up leaving it that I would chat with her Wed (tonight) at pool and we set a time. GEEZ I felt like an idiot. "Uhh.. hullo... uuhh.. yeah... umm... I was calling to see if you'd have any time..." Her "For a massage..." Me: "Uh yeah.. or whatever... no yeah a massage" God what a dork!

Oh yeah... I almost forgot. My TMI falsitude... the untruthidness... the ... ah you know what I mean. It was number 2. Never raced Carts.

I Missed TMI...

Went to look... it was no longer there... Hmph. I'll just have to do my own:


1. How are your March Madness picks doing? or What is your favorite event?

Let's see green is IN so that's fabulous. Gas IS going up. Oh.. that's not what we're talking about? Uh March wha? Ok I'm not that clueless... but as I don't like to watch and therefore do not follow basketball... Like to play. Bored to tears watching. Sorry.


2. What is the best April Fool's joke - EVER?

I don't do April fool's jokes because that would be predictable. Can't let 'em see me coming! I'll list a few favs OTHER than April Fools though

There's the time I tied Chester's chair to the back of his desk in his cube so he couldn't pull it out.

For a whole week I left 1 bolt, or screw, or nut under Chester's chair every day (he's horribly OCD) until I walked in and he had it dissasembled.

Then there was the time I scrambled Chester's books (his O'Reilley books are all color coded and alphabetized... again with the OCD.. oh and he has about 50 of them)
Which then led to the time I took them all leaving just dust bunnies on the shelves (he had real issues about those books)

The best was when I rigged a box of packing peanuts in his overhead bookshelf in his cube so that when he opened the door (it opened up and slid back like old timey garage doors) it dumped them all out. The coup de gras on that one though, was the Chester has to have 5 fans going in his cube at all times. I was hoping he'd have them on. Sure enough.. phbttthhh!! Peanuts everywhere.

Maybe there's a reason he and I do the whole love/hate thing... hmmmmm


3. Valentine's Day - bogus holiday or romantic holiday?

Uhh... have you READ my VD posts?! They all end in horrible mutilation. BOH--GUUHS!!

4. If you made any New Year's Resolutions have you broken them yet? or What have you done lately to make yourself a better person?

Not this year. I'm still working on my 2006 resolution to get in better shape. I think I'm doing ok on that one. It's really more of a lifetime goal than 1 year resolution.


5. If you believe in 'regret', what is your biggest regret? If you don't believe in 'regret', what do you call 'errors in judgment' or 'missed opportunities' in your philosophy of life?

Cue the sad violins... again do you READ this blog?! No... ok let me fill you in..

Actually I try not to believe in regret. But it's inevitable. I regret things didn't work out with Ellen (previous love).. I regret things didn't work out with the company from hell... I regret I let myself get suckered in by Sandy. We're just at the tip of the iceberg if you look at it in those terms. But I prefer to think of each as a life lesson.

Bonus (as in optional): Tell us about four things about yourself, one of which isn't true.

I can play 5 instruments.
I used to race carts in the JICA.
I taught myself to sail.
I got my open water dive card when I was 14.


Ok so TMI Tuesday is still there. April Fools!! I had yah for a second no?... no.... Eh well..



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I have an idea for a post Friday. There are so many "something" days. Like Mute Monday. TMI Tuesday. WTF Wed.. etc. etc. I saw this on a forum and it looked kinda like fun to try once. Twice if we like it. I know there are other stuff so this could either be awesome or a flop. Either way I know I'LL find it highly amusing.

I'm going to call it Free Association Friday. What I'm going to do is post either a word, phrase, sentence etc.. Then this is where it get's fun. YOU post a comment... free associate away. Then the next person who comments free associates on your comment. Each person takes the previous comment and responds in kind. For example:

I post: Bagel

Commenter 1: Mmmm.. cream cheese
Commenter 2: Cream... WHIPPED cream
Commenter 3: Whipped cream spread on my...

I think it'd be fun to see how long it goes on and where it goes. Especially considering THIS crowd ;)

EDIT --- Yeah I know there are several of these. Nothing new. Didn't mean for it to sound like I was inventing it.